l/^ditorium  "["healer 


Continental  and  Commercial 
National  Bank 

of  Chicago 

Capital,  Surplus  and  Undivided  Profit Sy  $33,000,000 
OFFICERS 


Arthur  Reynolds 
Ralph  Van  Vechten 
Alex.  Robertson 
Herman  Waldeck 
John  C.  Craft 
James  R.  Chapman 


\'.-Pres't 
V.-Pres't 
V.-Pres't 
V.-Pres't 
V.-Pres't 
V.-Pres't 


George  M.  Reynolds,  -  -  President 
William  T.  Bruckner  V.-Pres't 
Nathaniel  R.  Losch  Cashier 

John  R.  Washburn  Ass't  Cashier 
Harvey  C.  Vernon  j^ss't  Cashier 
Edward  S.  Lacey 

Chairman  of  .A^dvisorv  Committee 


George  B.  Smith  Ass't  Cashier 
Wilber  Hattery  Ass't  Cashier 
H.  Erskine  Smith  Ass't  Cashier 
WilsonW.  Lampert.Ass't  Cashier 
Dan  Norman,  Ass't  Cashier 

George  A.  Jackson  Ass't  Cashier 


Continental  and  Commercial 
Trust  and  Savings  Bank 

Capital,  Surplus  and  Undivided  Profits,  $5,000,000 

Trust,  Savings  and  Bond  Departments 
OFFICERS 


John  Jay  Abbott,  Vice-President 
Arthur  Reynolds,  Vice-President 
Charles  C.  Wilson,  Cashier 


George  M.  Reynolds,  -  -  President 

Frank  H.  Jones,  Secretary 
William  P.  Kopf ,  Ass't  Secretary 


Henry  C.  Olcott,  Mgr.  Bond  Dpt. 
Robert  J.  Hercock,  Ass't  Cashier 
Albert  S.  Martin,  Ass't  Cashier 


The  Hibernian  Banking 
Association 

Capital,  Surplus  and  Undivided  Profits,  $3,000,000 
OFFICERS 

George  M.  Reynolds,  -  -  President 


David  R.  Lewis,  Vice-President 
Henry  B.  Clarke,  Vice-President 
Ixiuis  B.  Clarke,  Vice-President 


Frederic  S.  Hebard,  Cashier 
Everett  R.  McFadden,  Secretary 


John  P.  V.  Murpby,  Mgr.  S.  Dpt. 
George  Allan,  Ass't  Cashier 
Thomas  E.  McGrath,  Ass't  Cash. 


Combined  Resources  of  these  Affiliated  Banks 
Over  $250,000,000 


B^ll  li  4^m  111  System 


The  Newspaper  and  the  Telephone 


"NJewspapermen  who  are  still  young  re- 
member the  time  when  the  telephone 
was  scarcely  thought  of  as  a  medium  for 
gathering  news.  Today  it  is  one  of  the 
most  important  factors  in  the  news-gather- 
ing organization.  Editor  and  reporter  rely 
upon  it  as  their  chief  aid  in  the  day's  work. 

Bell  Service  has  revolutionized  newspaper  methods  by 
the  quickness  and  ease  with  which  it  makes  voice-to- 
voice  communication  possible,  regardless  of  time  or  dis- 
tance. It  makes  "more  speed"  possible  where  speed  is 
needed  most. 

The  development  of  modern  news  collecting,  like  the 
progress  of  many  other  lines  of  business,  has  been 
coincident  with  the  development  of  the  Bell  telephone. 


CHICAGO    TELEPHONE     COMPANY 


THE  BOOK  OF  THE  PRESS  CLUB  SHOW 


CLUB  OF  CHICA^ 

26  North  Dearborn  Street 


OFFICERS 

R.  R.  Atkinson,  President. 
R.  C.  Cornell.  First  Vice-President. 
Frank  Comerford,   Second  Vice-President. 
Charles  E.  Schlytern,  Treasurer. 
Edwin  F.  Clipson,  Financial  Secretary. 
H.  Percye  Millar,  Recording  Secretary. 
Col.  William   Lightfoot  Visscher,   Librarian. 
W.  B.  Norton,  D.  D.,  Chaplain. 


Michael  F.  Girten 
Robert  H.  Rohde 
Thornton  L.  Smith 


DIRECTORS 


Stanley  Mitchell 
Rudolph  Berliner 
Harry  W.  Shroyer 


Committees 


Membership  Committee — Stanley  Mitchell,  Chairman, 
Herald ;  William  G.  Edens,  Vice-Chairman ;  Charles  Led- 
erer.  Secretary;  Leigh  Reilly,  Herald;  Richard  Henry 
Little,  Herald';  W.  E.  Moore,  Daily  News;  E.  H.  Defe- 
baugh,  American  Lumbermen  ;  Paul  Williams,  Associated 
Press ;  W.  A.  Patterson,  \\'estern  Newspaper  Union ; 
Henry  N.  Gary,  Publishers'  Association ;  Thurber  W.  Gush- 
ing, Evening  Post ;  John  Fay,  New  York  World  ;  H.  Percye 
Millar,  New  York  Times. 

Entertainment  Committee — Harry  ^V.  Shroyer,  Chair- 
man;  Walter  H.  Wood,  Vice-Chairman;  Blaine  J.  Brick- 
wood,  Secretary ;  George  J.  Kavanaugh,  Milton  R.  Hart, 
Harris  J.  Frank,  De  Lysle  Ferree  Cass,  Floyd  Gibbons, 
William  Frederick  Nutt. 

Reception  Committee — Dr.  William  Frederick  Nutt, 
Chairman ;  John  McGovern,  De  Lysle  F.  Cass,  Charles 
Lederer,  Arthur  J.  Pickering,  Dr.  Thorwald  Anda,  \^^  D. 
Eaton,  Blaine  T.  Brickwood,  David  B.  Clarksou.  Eben  H. 
Norris,  E.  F.  Clipson,  Col.  W.  E.  Ray,  M.  V.  ^\'ieland, 
Herbert  Vanderhoof,  W.  C.  Van  Gilder. 

Speakers  Committee — George  S.  Foster,  Chairman  ;  \\' . 
C.  Van  Gilder,  yice  chairman  ;  Richard  Henry  Little,  E.  O. 
Phillips,  Charles  Ffrench,  Michael  F.  Girten,  Charles  N. 
Wheeler,  W'm.  G.  Edens,  A.  Milo  Bennett,  Col.  Milton  J. 
Foreman,  George  Cooke  Adams. 

Dance  Committee — De  Lysle  Ferree  Cass,  Chairman  ; 
William  Frederick  Nutt,  Vice-Chairman  ;  A.  Milo  Bennett. 
Eben  H.  Norris,  Axel  Christensen,  J.  Harry  Ashley,  Victor 
Eubank,  Harry  Lytle,  Floyd  P.  Gibbons,  Gilman   Parker. 

Building  Committee — Michael  F.  Girten,  Chairman  : 
Charles  E.  Schlytern,  F.  F.  Clipson. 

Secretary  of  Publicity — I'^lward  J.  Dolierty. 

Billiard  Committee — C.  L.  Prindle,  Chairman :  Ed. 
Pickard,  P.  C.  Holland. 

House  Committee — E.  F.  Clipson,  Chairman;  Frank 
Kipfer,  R.  C.  Cornell,  W.  D.  Bartholomew,  Gene  Morgan. 


Pool   Committee — Eben    H.    Norris,    Chairman ;   C.    E. 
Glessner,  Edward  Fullerton,  O.  A.  Mather,  George  Bryant. 

Art  Committee — William  M.  Knox,  Chairman ;  Franc 
J.  Hernon,  Charles  Lederer. 

Committee  at  New  York — S.  E.  Darby,  Chairman  ;  J. 
W.  Long,  E.  F.  Ingraham. 

Committee  at  Washington — William  J.  Cochran,  Chair- 
man ;  G.  E.  Roberts. 


Literary  Committee — John  McGoyern,  Chairman  ;  Opie 
Read,  Forrest  Crissey,  Byron  Williams,  William  Frederic 
Nutt,  George  W.  Wiggs,  Rex  Beach,  W.  D.  Eaton,  Dr.  G. 
Frank  Lydston,  Frank  Comerford,  Col.  William  Lightfoot 
\'isscher. 

Constitution  Committee — Michael  F.  Girten,  Chairman  ; 
Frank  Comerford,  John  McGovern. 


Scoop  Committee- 
Stanley  B.  Mitchell. 


Thornton  L.  Smith.  E.  F.  Clipson, 


Women's  Auxiliary  Committee — Mrs.  Walter  A.  Wash- 
burne,  Chairman;  Mrs.  Charles  Lederer,  Vice-Chairman; 
Mrs.  James  C.  Russell,  Mrs.  Franc  B.  Wilkie,  Mrs.  W.  D. 
Eatoii,  Mrs.  O.  A.  Mather,  Mrs.  W.  B.  Norton,  Mrs.  Leigh 
Reilly,  Mrs.  Walton  Perkins,  Mrs.  Frank  D.  Comerford, 
Mrs.'  H.  Percye  Millar,  Mrs.  Robert  Rohde,  Mrs.  W.  C. 
\'an  Gilder,  Mrs.  Virginia  Brooks- Washburne.  Mrs.  Harry 
W.  Shroyer,  Mrs.  George  Cooke  Adams,  Mrs.  A.  Milo 
Bennett,  Mrs.  Floyd  P.  Gibbons,  Mrs.  Edgar  A.  Hall,  Mrs. 
Clara  V.  Wood,  Mrs.  A.  H.  Wagoner,  Mrs.  Opie  Read, 
Mrs.  John  McGovern,  Mrs.  Stanley  Mitchell,  Mrs.  Mary 
Moncure  Parker,  Mrs.  J.  F.  Presnell,  Mrs.  Barratt  O'Hara, 
Mrs.  Sigmund  Krausz,  Mrs.  Herbert  Vanderhoof,  Mrs.  W. 
.\.  Evans,  Mrs.  W.  E.  Ray.  Mrs.  Axel  Christensen,  Mrs. 
I.  E.  Sanborn,  Mrs.  Frank' M.  Smith,  Mrs.  Garrison,  Mrs. 
L.  N.  Barlow,  Mrs.  Boiling  Arthur  Johnson,  Mrs.  William 
Johnson,  Miss  Marguerite  Ray,  Mrs.  Frank  Roderus,  Mrs. 
F.  F.  Provos,  Mrs.  Charles  Fishback,  Mrs.  W.  J.  Shanks, 
Mrs.  P.  F.  Lowder,  Mrs.  B.  T.  Cass. 


THE  BOOK  OF  THE  PRESS  CLUB  SHOW 


PATRONI 


Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mrs. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 


Medill  McCormick 
J.   Ogden   Arnidur 
Frank    O.    Louden 
John   Borden 
E.  A.  Cudahy 
Frederick  Hess 
Harlan   Ward   Cooley 
Samuel   Insull 
Geo.  T.  Buckingham 
P.  C.  Dyrenforth 

A.  A.  Sprague 
Levy  Mayer 
E.  B.  Butler 
Homer  A.  Stillvvell 
Charles  A.   Comiskey 
Wm.  A.  Tilden 

C.  H.  Thorne 
W.  C.  Gillette 

E.  M.  Bowman 
Emmons  Blaine 
George  A.  Soden 

H.  C.  Chatfield-Taylor 

B.  A.  Eckhart 
George  Higginson,  Jr. 

F.  H.  Armstrong 
Bion  J.  Arnold 
William  V.  Kelley 
Hubert  Burnham 
Horace  L.  Brand 

J.  Allen  Flaines 
Edward  Hasler 
Wm.   Prescott  Hunt 


Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Judi 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Dr. 
•Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 
Mr. 


Ralph  Otis 
Lockwood    Honore 
John  P.  Hopkins 
William    Wrigley 
Alfred  Clover 
F.  A.  Steuert 
Fred  Upham 
J.  L.  Pirie 
Rufus  C.  Dawes 
Albert  Loeb 
R.  P.  La  Mont 
George  S.  Foster 
re  O.  M.  Torrison 
M.  E.  Greenebaum 
Robert  W.  Hunt 
Burton  Hansen 

E.  W.  Cribben 

F.  O.  Wetmore 
J.  Gowan-Stobo 
J.  H.  Eliel 
John  T.  Connery 
A.  yi.  Schroyer 
P.  J.  Lucy 
Julius  Hoelscher 
Charles  G.  Dawes 
Herman  Paepcke 
William  Wilms 
Morris  Fleckles 
Geo.  W.  Vaux 
Clare   Hartigan 
A.  L.  Craig 


THE  BOOK  OF  THE  PRESS  CLUB  SHOW 


Sometimes  dreams  are  gleams  that  one  has  liad  of 
pleasant  things  to  ponder  over,  yet  they  are  only  dreams. 
Like  would-be  humorous  burlesque,  they  are  merely  fancy 
and  there's  nothing  in  them.  However,  the)-  are  better 
than  burlesque,  generall)',  in  the  fact  that  they  are  human 
and  come  somewhere  within  the  range  of  possibility. 

Oldtime  memories  of  the  Press  Club  of  Chicago,  to 
one  who  has  been  here  almost  a  lifetime,  are  pleasant  to 
ponder  upon.  They  seem  dreamy  and  yet  they  are  true. 
And  the  individual  celebrities  that  they  embrace ;  celebrities 
in  so  many  branches  of  life,  passing  strange.  I  write  of  it 
all  in  the  most  desultory  way,  and  yet  casually,  from  mem- 
ory. 

From  the  night  when  Mark  Twain,  known  to  all  the 
civilized  world  and  greatly  loved  by  nearly  all  of  it ;  a  char- 
acter on  the  rolls  of  fame,  first  suggested  the  idea  of  the 
Press  Club,  at  a  banc^uet  that  was  being  given  in  honor  of 
one  of  the  greatest  generals  known  to  military  history  and 
afterward  President  of  this  wondrous  republic,  down  to 
the  night,  a  fortnight  ago,  when  the  club  entertained  the 
present  Mayor  of  the  city  who  was  elected  by  the  biggest 
majority  ever  given  by  its  citizenry  for  any  purpose,  this 
story  has  been  amazing. 

Here  once  came  the  divine  Patti  to  sing ;  Joe  Jefiferson 
told  stories  here;  Murat  Halstead  and  "Marse"  Henry 
W'aterson  made  speeches  here ;  Bill  Nye  and  James  Whit- 
comb  Riley  hobnobbed  with  us  fellows ;  President  McKinley 
came  and  shook  hands  with  us,  and  his  Secretary  of  State, 
who  had  been  the  private  secretary  of  Lincoln  and  who  was 
afterwards  Minister  Plenipotentiary  to  the  Court  of  St. 
James,  John  Hay,  author  of  "Little  Breeches"  and  "Jim 
Bludsoe,"  came  with  the  President  and  introduced  that 
exalted  personage  to  all  of  us  in  his  own  charming  way. 
Here  came  also,  as  guests  of  the  club,  Presidents  Roosevelt 
and  Taft,  and  Vice-President  Fairbanks  became  a  member 
lit  the  club  and  wrote  eloquently  of  its  strength  and 
cliaracter. 

Here  came  Gentilly,  who  had  photographed  Arizona 
when  the  territory  did  not  contain  so  many  white  folks  as 
now  occupy  the  Monadnock  block.  He  brought  with  him 
an  Indian  boy,  a  full-blooded  Apache  that  he  had  bought 
from  an  old  Pima  squaw  for  thirty  dollars.  He  sent  the 
boy  to  the  public  schools  here,  finished  him  at  the  Illinois 
University  and  this  boy — Carlos  Montezema — graduated 
in  a  Chicago  college  of  medicine  and  is  today  a  successful 
practicing  physician  in  this  city.  Robertson  painted  a  life- 
size  portrait  of  his  Indian  boy  and  called  it  "The  Eagle's 
Last  Flight."  The  picture  is  today  the  chief  work  of  art  in 
the  club's  collection. 

Col.  Cody — "Buffalii  I'.ill" — who  was  nften  a  visitor, 
took  the  boy  Montezuma  with  him  in  the  famous  plains- 
man's first  hall  shows,  that  led  to  the  "Wild  West"  exhi- 
bition. 

Here  came,  during  the  World's  Fair — the  Columbian 
Exposition — the  newspapermen  of  the  world,  talking  all  tlie 
languages  .since  Babel,  and  Gee !  what  a  bully  lot  they  were. 
The  dancers  of  the  Midway  Plaisance  came  here  to  cater  to 
the  club's  guests,  with  them  the  original  "Little  Egypt,"  with 


her  sli>e-black  eyes  and  her  sinuous  and  sensuous  move- 
ments to  the  strange  music  of  her  land. 

F.  Marion  Crawford,  the  necromancer  of  Mediterranean 
Romance,  became  familiar  to  us,  and  I-lenry  Hudson  Kit- 
son,  the  sculptor,  who  carved  Carmen  Sylva  and  her  royal 
liusband  in  a  studio  prepared  for  him  in  the  king's  palace  at 
Bucharest ;  who  formed  the  colossal  statue  of  Farragut  for 
the  Public  Gardens  at  Boston ;  who  has  done  hundreds  of 
other  world-famous  pieces  of  sculpture  and  who  married 
Theo.  Ruggles,  daughter  of  Gen.  Ruggles  of  Civil  War  fame, 
and  who,  herself,  became  a  famous  sculptress  as  his  pupil, 
was  here  then,  one  of  us. 

There  was  a  night  when  Luther  Laflin  Mills,  the 
brilliant  jurist,  delivered  a  sparkling  and  eloquent  speech 
in  praise  of  poets  and  poetry,  especially  the  poets  and  poetry 
of  the  Press  Club,  which  was  then  being  exploited,  and 
there  was  another  night  when  John  Ritchie  shot  the  stuffin' 
out  of  the  cuckoo  clock  because  its  cuckoo  cuckooed  just  at 
the  moment  when  he  got  a  big  and  valuable  "House"  beaten 
by  four  pitiful  little  "deuces." 

Frank  X'anderlip,  president  of  the  biggest  bank  in  Amer- 
ica, was  once  president  of  the  Press  Club  ;  dozens  of  Chi- 
cago-trained, Press  Club  members  have  gone  into  the  world 
from  this  fold  to  teach  newspaperdom,  especially  in  New 
York  and  London.  George  Ade,  Frank  Baum,  who  made 
"The  Wizard  of  Oz" ;  Frank  Pixley,  who  wrote  "The  Burgo- 
master," "Prince  of  Pilsen,"  "Woodland,"  and  ever  so  many 
other  successful  plays  and  things,  are  members  of  the  Chi- 
cago Press  Club  and  so  are  Rex  Beach,  Opie  Read,  Forest 
Crissy,  McCutcheon  of  "Graustark,"  McCutcheon  of  the  car- 
toons, and  Jack  London. 

William  Jennings  Bryan,  when  a  candidate  for  Presi- 
dent, was  a  member  of  this  club,  and  is  yet,  though  National 
Secretary  of  State.  He  has  ever  since  had  a  room  here  and 
generally  makes  the  club  his  home  when  in  the  city. 

Professor  Cho  Yo,  a  distinguished  Japanese  scholar 
and  scientist,  came  to  the  club,  as  a  member,  at  the  time  of 
the  World's  Fair,  and  was  ever  after  a  person  of  interest 
and  admiration.  Only  a  few  days  ago  he  died  in  Texas  and 
was  brought  back  to  this  city  by  the  club  for  interment  in 
the  Press  Club's  lot  at  Mt.  Hope  Cemetery. 

Joseph  and  Samuel  Medill,  founders  of  the  Chicago 
Tribune,  Stanley  Waterloo,  author  of  "Ab,"  and  a  score 
more  of  successful  books ;  Frank  Wilkie,  for  years  editor  of 
the  Chicago  Times  and  author  of  many  romances,  were 
presidents  of  the  club.  Ben  King,  Eugene  Field,  Nixon 
Waterman,  Charles  Eugene  Banks  and  many  other  famous 
poets,  were,  before  some  of  them  died  and  are,  of  those  who 
still  live,  of  this  distinguished  membership. 

Many  great  artists,  brilliant  statesmen  and  orators, 
lawyers  and  jurists,  painters,  philosophers,  manufacturers, 
publishers  and  musicians  are  of  the  life  membership  of  the 
club,  but  of  its  back-bone  and  those  who  give  it  the  atmos- 
phere of  newspaperdom  and  literature  are  the  daily  workers 
of  the  press,  its  reporters  and  special  writers,  the  creators  of 
fiction  for  the  magazines  and  the  men  who  make  the  pic- 
tures to  illustrate  the  current  doings  of  the  world. 

No  pent  up  Utica  controls  this  world  of  ours ;  we  are  in 
touch  with  the  earth  in  this  club-house  of  ours.  Tlie  fire 
alarm,  the  telephone,  the  telegraph,  the  people  of  our  ilk, 
the  presses  that  these  men  write  for  and  draw  for,  the  news 
that  they  procure  and  convey,  make  them  the  propagandists, 
publicity  producers,  informants  and  fashionists  of  all  that 
this  vast  city  learns  every  day,  and  from  them  it  flashes  all 
over  the  broad  expanse  of  the  adjacent  commonwealths. 

In  short  the  Press  Club  is  a  mighty  big  thing:  heap 
bigger  than  I  have  time,  space,  capacity  or  inclination  to 
tell  you.  Fact  is  this  screed  has  barely  touched  the  subject. 
WM.  LIGHTFOOT  VISSCHER. 


THE  BOOK   OF  THE  PRESS   CLUB   SHOW 


THE  PREf 


CLUB  OF  CHICAGO 

ITS  BIRTH 


The  suggestion  for  the  organization  of  the  Press  Chib  of 
Chicago  was  made  in  1879.  In  November  of  that  year,  Gen- 
eral U.  S.  Grant,  ex-president  of  the  United  States,  having 
returned  from  a  trip  around  the  world,  was  entertained  by  the 
citizens  of  Chicago.  A  reception  at  McVicker's  theater  was 
one  of  the  features  of  the  entertainment,  and  to  this  many  dis- 
tinguished people  from  out  of  the  city  were  bidden.  Among 
this  number  was  Samuel  L.  Clemens  (Mark  Twain)  one 
of  America's  most  entertaining  writers.  Mr.  Clemens  met 
during  his  stay  in  the  city  many  of  his  friends  in  the  jour- 
nalistic profession,  including  the  late  Franc  B.  Wilkie,  of  the 
Times,  and  Melville  E.  Stone,  then  of  the  Daily  Neic's.  W'hile 
these  and  others  were  enjoying  an  hour  of  social  converse,  Mr. 
Clemens  asked:  "\Miy  is  it  you  Chicago  newspaper  men  do 
not  have  a  club  similar  to  the  Xew  York  Press  Club?'' 

The  question  precipitated  a  discussion  of  the  subject  in 
which  all  took  part.  Mr.  Clemens  was  informed  that  Press 
Clubs  had  been  organized  here  but  they  had  fallen  to  pieces, 
and  various  reasons  for  this  fact  were  given.  Mr.  Clemens 
believed  Chicago  could  form  a  Press  Club  that  would  last  and 
Mr.  Franc  B.  Wilkie  agreed  with  his  eastern  confrere.  He 
said  he  would  endeavor  to  interest  Chicago  journalists  in  the 
scheme,  and  Mr.  Clemens  urged  such  a  course,  and  promised 
to  do  what  he  could  to  serve  such  an  organization. 

The  scheme  thus  fathered  made  rapid  headway.  ^lessrs, 
Wilkie  and  Stone  secured  the  services  of  Mr.  W.  K.  Sullivan 
of  the  Evening  Journal,  and  after  several  weeks  of  planning 
and  discussing,  a  meeting  was  held  at  the  club  room  of  the 
Tremont  House,  in  the  afternoon  of  January  11,  1880,  for  the 
purpose  of  talking  over  the  subject  of  orgaiaization.  Sixteen 
journalists  were  present,  and  they  organized  by  electing  Mr. 
Wilkie  president  and  Mr.  Stone  secretary.  The  discussion 
evidenced  the  fact  that  there  was  an  unanimous  sentiment  in 
favor  of  organizing  a  club  of  newspaper  men,  and  also  that 
such  organization  should  not  be  a  failure. 

The  enthusiasm  of  those  present  indicated  that  desire  to 
make  the  club  a  success  would  not  be  lacking,  and  the  sixteen 
gentlemen  signed  their  names  to  a  temporary  constitution,  and. 
after  appointing  a  committee  to  secure  rooms,  adjourned  to 
meet  at  the  Tremont  House,  on  January  15.  The  Tribune  of 
Tanuarv  12,  1880,  contained  the  following  report  of  the  meet- 
ing: 

During  the  past  few  weeks  several  meetings  of  Chicago 
journalists  have  been  held  at  the  Tremont  House  to  arrange 
for  the  formation  of  a  "Press  Club,"  and  such  an  organization 
has  finallv  been  effected.  The  club  was  organized  by  the  adop- 
tion of  a  constitution  and  by-laws  and  the  election  of  tem- 
porary officers  to  serve  until  the  regular  annual  meeting,  which 
will  be  held  at  the  same  place,  on  Thursday  afternoon,  at  5 
o'clock.  The  meetings  have  been  thoroughly  representative, 
and  gentlemen  connected  with  all  the  daily  newspapers  in  Chi- 
cago have  participated,  so  that  the  club  starts  under  very  favor- 
able auspices.    The  thanks  of  the  club  are  due  and  ha\e  been 


formally  extended  to  the  proprietors  of  the  Tremont  House  for 
the  accommodations  furnished  the  club. 

Thursday  following,  January  15,  another  enthusiastic 
gathering  of  newspaper  men,  intent  on  making  the  Press  Club 
movement  a  success,  is  recorded  as  held  at  the  Tremont  House. 
Twenty-four  working  journalists  were  present,  all  having 
signed  the  temporary  constitution  and  thus  become  members  of 
the  organization.  Mr.  Wilkie  again  presided,  and  Mr.  Stone 
acted  as  secretary.  Everj'one  understood  the  object  of  the 
meeting,  and  but  little  time  was  spent  in  talk.  Mr.  Theodore 
Gestefeld,  of  the  Siaats-Zeitimg,  moved  that  the  meeting  pro- 
ceed to  ballot  for  officers  for  the  ensuing  year.  The  motion 
prevailed,  and  after  nominations,  and  the  usual  talk  which  fol- 
lows or  precedes  such  phase  of  election  matters,  the  result  was 
announced  as  follows : 

FOR  PRESIDENT 

Franc  1!.  Wilkie.  TIic  Times. 

VICE-PRESIDENTS 

First — Guy  Magee,  The  Tribune. 
Second — W.  T.  Collins,  The  Telegraph. 
Third — John  F.  Ballantyne,  The  Inter  Ocean. 

SECRETARY  -\XD  TRE.\SURER 

Melville  E.  Stone. 

The  following  were  elected  members  of  the  Executive 
Committee : 

Theo.  Gestefeld,  Staats-Zcitung. 
W.  K.  Sullivan,  The  Journal. 
James  Maitland,  The  Tribune. 
Joseph  R.  Dunlop,  The  Times. 
T.  C.  MaclMillan,  The  Inter  Ocean. 

The  meeting  adjourned  until  January  25,  when  it  was 
agreed  that  the  following  persons  should  be  classed  as  charter 
members  of  the  club: 

Melville  E.  Stone  Henry  F.  Donovan 

T.  C.  ^lacMillan  William  T.  Hall 

F.  O.  Bennett  W.  T.  Collins 

T.  F.  Ballantyne  C.  A.  Snowden 

Piatt  Lewis  W.  H.  Hicks 

\\'.  P.  Hanscom  \N'.  K.  Sullivan 

I>anc  B.  Wilkie  W.  B.  Sullivan 

Jos.  R.  Dunlop  John  J.  Flinn 

Theo.  Gestefeld  James  Maitland 

Elwyn  A.  Barron  Lawrence  Hardy 

Thos.  E.  Bumside  John  E.  Wilkie 

Guy  Magee  Sam  \".  Steele 
Rodney  Welch 

The  committee  on  rooms  reported  that  two  rooms  could 
be  procured,  premises  at  133  Clark  street,  where  the  Club  re- 
mained for  several  years. 


THE  BOOK   OF   THE  PRESS   CLUB    SHOW 


THE  KING  OF  THE  DARK  CHAMBER 

By  RABIN DRANATH  TAGORE 

Produced    under    direction    of    Benedict    Papot,    under    the    auspices  of  the  Press  Club  of  Cliicago. 


As  Mr.  Frank  Crane  expresses  it:  Raijindranath 
Tagore  is  the  Hindu  poet  and  preacher  to  whom  the  Nobel 
Prize  was  recently  awarded :      .      .      . 

"I  would  commend  these  xnlumes,  and  especially  the 
one  entitled  'Sadhana,'  the  collection  of  essays,  to  all  intel- 
ligent readers.  I  know  of  nothing,  except  it  be  Maeterlinck, 
in  the  whole  modern  range  of  the  literature  of  the  inner  life 
that  can  compare  with  them. 

There  are  no  preachers  nor  writers  upon  spiritual 
topics,  whether  in  Europe  or  America,  that  have  the  depth 
of  insight,  the  quickness  of  religious  apperception,  com- 
bined with  the  intellectual  honesty  and  scientific  clearness 
of  Tagore.     .     .     . 

Here  is  a  book  from  a  master,  free  as  the  air,  with 
a  mind  universal  as  the  sunshine.  He  writes,  of  course, 
from  the  standpoint  of  the  Hindu.  But,  strange  to  say,  his 
spirit  and  teaching  come  nearer  to  Jesus,  as  we  find  Him 
in  the  Gospels,  than  any  modern  Christian  writer  I  know. 

He  does  for  the  average  reader  what  Bergson  and 
Eucken  are  doing  for  scholars:  he  rescues  the  soul  and  its 
faculties  from  their  enslavement  to  logic-chopping.  He 
shows  us  the  way  back  to  Nature  and  her  spiritual  voices. 

He  rebukes  our  materialistic,  wealth-mad,  \\estern  life 
with  the  dignity  and  authority  of  one  of  the  old  Hebrew 
prophets.     ... 

He  opens  up  the  meaning  of  life.  He  makes  us  feel  the 
redeeming  fact  that  life  is  tremendous,  a  worth-while  ad- 
venture. 'Everything  has  sprung  from  immortal  life  and 
is  vibrating  with  life.     LIFE  LS  IMMENSE.'     .      .      . 

Tagore  is  a  great  human  being.  His  heart  is  warm 
with  love.    His  thoughts  are  pure  and  high  as  the  gala.xy." 

The  King  of  the  Dark  Chamber  is  the  most  important 
plav  of  Tagore.  Couched  in  a  form  absolutely  foreign  to 
our  own  stage,  lacking"  in  what  we  call  the  dramatic  element, 
it  is  nevertheless  an  intensely  vital  drama  dealing  with  the 
ever  present  problem  of  the  relation  of  the  human  being  to 
the  Deity,  the  attainment  of  inward  peace. 

Of  course  the  play  is  symbolic,  but  its  symbolism  is  so 
clear,  so  obvious,  that  the  merest  tyro  will  easily  grasp  its 
meaning.  Three  of  the  scenes  are  played  in  absolute  dark- 
ness— within  the  dark  chamber — the  innermost  recess  of 
human  consciousness,  and  The  King  of  the  Dark  Chamber 
himself,  while  audible,  is  never  seen.  \\'e  may  hear  him, 
we  may  feel  his  presence,  but  we  may  never  see  him.     The 


dark  chamber,  so  Tagore  tells  us,  is  situated  deep  down  in 
the  center  of  the  earth  and  no  lamp  will  ever  be  lighted 
there.  It  is  symbolic  of  the  innermost  center  of  our  being 
no  philosophy  will  ever  interpret  for  us.  If  we  set  out  with 
this  conception  we  shall  find  no  difficulty  in  interpreting  the 
drama. 

The  curtain  rises  upon  the  outskirts  of  the  city  at  early 
dawn.  A  festival  is  to  take  place  and  strangers  and  town 
folks  gossip  about  the  King  who  is  never  seen.  A  rumor 
spreads  that  it  is  because  he  is  hideous — others  suspect  that 
there  is  no  King.  Grandfather,  however,  a  poor  jovial  beg- 
ger,  knows  Him  and  defends  Him  always,  though  he  has 
never  seen  him.  He  has  his  retinue  of  children,  the  blessed 
children  who  believe  without  seeing.  But  a  mistake  must 
have  occurred  somewhere,  for  the  arrival  of  the  King  is 
heralded  and  he  does  indeed  appear  and  is  acclaimed  by  all 
but  a  very  few  who  run  to  Grandfather  for  advice. 

The  second  scene  takes  place  in  the  dark  chamber. 
Queen  Sudarshana,  obsessed  by  the  darkness,  cries  out  to 
her  hand  maiden  Surangama  for  light.  Full  of  youth  and 
vitality,  slie  cannot  bear  the  suspense,  cannot  bear  the  idea 
of  always  meeting  the  King  of  The  Dark  Chamber,  her 
husband,  in  his  dark  abode  and  when  He  comes  at  last  she 
prays  and  entreats  to  such  an  extent  that  she  is  allowed  the 
privilege  of  seeking  him  out  from  the  turret  of  her  palace 
during  the  festivities  of  the  evening. 

The  third  scene  takes  place  in  front  of  the  pleasure 
garden.  Foreign  Kings  have  come  to  seek  out  Queen  Sudar- 
shana and  attend  the  great  festival.  Among  them  the  most 
prominent  is  the  King  of  Kanchi.  He  represents  the  wealth, 
the  power,  the  glory  of  the  world.  It  takes  him  but  a  few 
moments  to  discover  that  the  so-called  King  is  a  mere  jjre- 
tender,  and  but  a  few  minutes  to  cow  the  pretender  and 
make  him  his  tool. 

The  ft)urth  scene  takes  place  upon  the  turret  of  the 
royal  palace.  Sudarshana  is  deprived  of  the  aid  of  Suran- 
gama, the  faithful  maid,  who  knows  the  King  and  would  not 
let  her  go  astray.  Left  to  her  own  resources,  she  spies  the 
pretender  and  her  whole  being  responds  to  the  call  of 
physical  love.  She  sends  Rohini,  one  of  her  maidens,  to  take 
a  lotus  leaf  to  the  pretender  as  a  token  that  she  has  recog- 
nized him.  While  Rohini  is  away  on  her  mission  she  sum- 
mons the  children,  who  accompany  Grandfather,  and  bids 
them  sing  to  her.  Their  song  awakens  the  spiritual  side 
of  her  nature  and  already  she  regrets  her  forwardness  and 


THE   BOOK   OF   THE   PRESS   CLUB   SHOW 


7 


is  ashamed  to  have  made  advances.  Upcm  Ruhini's  return 
her  shame  is  enhanced  by  the  fact  that  the  pretender  did 
not  understand  and  had  to  he  coached  by  Kanchi.  I5ut  she 
is  not  victorious  in  the  struggle.  She  bribes  Rohini  so  as 
to  obtain  possession  of  the  pretender's  necklace,  which 
Kanchi  had  given  her  as  a  reward  for  bringing  the  lotus  leaf, 
and  clasps  it  to  her  neck  while  bewailing  her  fate. 

Scene  five  takes  place  before  the  pleasure  house.  It  is 
dusk.  The  gardeners  are  running  away.  Questioned  by 
Rohini  they  admit  that  they  were  warned  by  the  King  that 
they  must  leave.  Other  Kings  appear  trying  to  find  a  way 
out  of  the  garden.  An  unnatural  glow  surrounds  the  earth. 
The  birds  are  flying  away  and  Rohini  departs  in  quest  of 
the  King. 

Scene  six  takes  place  at  the  door  of  the  Queen's  palace. 
It  is  dark  and  the  red  fire  of  a  conflagration  is  lighting  the 
scene.  Kanclii  has  set  fire  to  the  woods.  But  the  fire  is 
now  beyond  control  and  Kanchi  calls  upon  the  pretender  to 
show  him  the  way  out  of  the  garden.  Queen  Sudarshana 
rushes  out  of  the  house  into  the  arms  of  the  pretender.  But 
the  pretender  rudely  repulses  her,  confesses  that  he  is  not 
the  King  and  escapes  with  Kanchi.  The  Queen  wishes  to 
rush  into  the  flame  to  wash  out  her  shame,  her  longing  and 
desire. 

Scene  seven  brings  us  to  the  Dark  Chamber.  Sudar- 
shana was  saved.  Saved  from  the  physical  flames  by  the 
intervention  of  the  King  of  The  Dark  Chamber.  She  had 
her  wisli,  slie  had  a  glimpse  of  Him,  but  alas!  in  her  own 
wiirds.  "Terrible — Oh,  it  was  terrible!  I  am  afraid  to  think 
of  what  I  saw.  Black,  black— <)  Thou  wert  black  like  ever- 
lasting night !  I  looked  on  Thee  but  for  one  instant.  The 
blaze  fell  across  Thy  features — Thou  wert  like  the  awful 
night  when  a  comet  swings  into  our  ken — and  I  closed  my 
eyes — I  could  not  lonk  on  Thee  longer.  Black  as  the  storm 
cloud,  black  as  the  shoreless  sea,  with  the  spectral  red  of 
twilight  on  its  waves !" 

She  confesses  her  love  for  another.  Announces  her 
determination  to  leave  and  is  not  detained  by  the  King. 

This  might  fitly  be  called  the  end  of  the  first  act. 

Scene  eight.  Sudarshana's  father  announces  to  his 
prime  minister  his  resolution  not  to  receive  his  daughter  as 
his  daughter,  but  only  as  a  servant. 

Scene  nine  brings  us  to  tlie  inner  apartment  of  the 
palace,  where  Queen  Sudarshana  opens  her  soul  to  Suran- 
gama  and  learns  of  the  unworthiness  of  tlie  man  with  whom 
she  has  fallen  in  lo\e. 

Scene  ten.  The  Kings  who  ha\e  learned  of  Sudar- 
shana's flight  have  fi;)llowed  her.  and  the  King  (jf  Kanclii 
sends  word  to  Sudarshana's  father  that  he  must  yield  his 
daughter  to  him.  The  other  Kings  arrive  also  and  readv 
to  fight  one  another  for  the  possession  of  Sudarshana. 

Scene  eleven  brings  us  back  to  the  interior  of  the  palace. 


Sudarshana  watches  the  fight  and  grackially  C(.imes  to  long 
for  the  King  of  The  Dark  Chamber,  whom  she  has  forsaken. 

In  scene  twelve  the  master  mind  Kanchi  reveals  his 
plans  to  his  tool,  the  pretender. 

Scene  thirteen  brings  us  back  to  the  inner  cliamber. 
where  Queen  Sudarshana  renounces  the  pretender  forever 
and   implores  the  real  King  for  mercy. 

In  scene  fourteen  the  princes  are  gathered  in  a  tent. 
They  await  the  arrival  of  Queen  Sudarshana.  They  have 
agreed  among  themselves  to  let  Sudarshana  choose  one  of 
them  and  that  all  others  will  abide  by  her  choice.  But  a 
vague  dread  permeates  the  assembly  and  instead  of  Sudar- 
shana it  is  Grandfather  vidio  appears  and  challenges  all  the 
Kings  to  fight  in  the  name  of  his  Master,  The  King  of  The 
Dark  Chamber. 

Scene  fifteen — Once  more  in  the  inner  chamber.  The 
King  has  shattered  the  inimical  forces  and  Sudarshana 
awaits  him  anxiously.  But  he  does  not  come.  He  has  gone. 
And  even  Grandfather  cannot  give  her  news  of  him.  So  she 
decides  to  remain  by  the  window  and  wait — wait  until  the 
King  does  come.  And  this  may  well  be  considered  the  end 
of  the  second  act. 

Scene  sixteen — ^^■e  are  back  upon  the  road  leading  to 
the  City  of  the  King  of  The  Dark  Chaml^er.  It  is  still  dark, 
just  before  dawn  and  the  King  of  Kanchi  confesses  to 
Grandfather  that  he  is  seeking  the  real  King  in  all  humility. 

Scene  seventeen,  just  before  the  break  of  day.  shows 
us  the  Queen  Sudarshana  trudging  on  foot  to  seek  the  King. 
Her  feet  are  sore  and  she  is  weary,  but  her  lieart  is  glad, 
for  in  renunciation  and  humility  she  has  found  peace  and 
happiness.  And  the  play  ends  with  a  short  scene  in  the 
Dark  Chamber,  where  we  heard  the  King  say:  "Today  I 
open  the  doors  of  this  dark  chamber — the  game  is  finished ! 
Come,  come  with  me  now,  outside — into  the  light,"  to  which 
Sudarshana  answers:  "First  let  me  bow  before  the  feet  of 
my  lord  of  darkness,  my  cruel,  my  terrible,  my  peerless 
one !" 

The  wonderful  analysis  of  the  character  of  Sudarshana, 
of  the  struggle  of  a  soul  between  the  earthly  and  the 
spiritual,  makes  this  play  one  of  the  most  refreshing  and  in- 
tellectual treats  that  we  have  had  for  a  long  time. 


Telephone  Randolph  2M4 


Eslahlished  1810 


Nahigian  Brothers 

Importers  of  Choice 

Oriental  Rugs  and  Carpets 

Wholesale  and  Retail 

122  Wabash  Ave. 

Chicago 


THE  BOOK  OF  THE  PRESS  CLUB  SHOW 


The   King  of  the   Dark  Chamber 


Cast   of   Characters 


King  of  the  Dark  Chamber Don  ;\Ierrifield 

Suvarna,  the  Pretender Lee  H.  Barchiy 

Grandfather J.   H.   Gilmour 

Kanchi Willis   Hall 

Koshala James    Nelson 

Avanti Redmond   D.   Flood 

Vidarbha Frank    Cullen 

Kalinga F.  T.  Raymond 

Oanchala Edgard  Murray,  Jr. 

Virat Norman  Meyer 

King  Kanya  Kubja Frank  M.  Readick 

Minister F.   Bendtseu 

Kumbha Frank  Bendtsen 

Madav R.  T.  Flood 

Janardan E.  Murray,  Jr. 

Kaundilya Frank  M.  Readick 

First  Man F.  T.  Raymond 

First  Citizen John  Osgood 

Second    Citizen Norman   Meyer 

Third    Citizen Frank   Cullen 

First  Herald Joseph   Singer 

Second  Herald Emmons  Martin 

City  Guard Albert  W.  Bryan 

Soldiers,  Doorkeepers,  Messengers,  Gardeners,  etc. 

Queen  Sudarshana Miss  Nannie  Palmer 

Surangama Miss  Audrey   Gilmour 

Kohini Miss  Beatrice  Miller 


Musical  setting  composed  by  Herbert  E.  Hyde,  choir- 
master St.  Peter's  Church. 

Solo  sung  by  George  Johnson. 

Mr.  Herbert  E.  Hyde  will  also  furnish  the  organ  obli- 
gato  music  to  all  the  lyrics  throughout  the  play. 

Overture  "Jubel,"  courtesy  of  Chicago  Federation  of 
Musicians. 

The  fine  rugs  used  in  this  production  have  been  kindly 
loaned  to  the  Press  Club  by  the  Oriental  rug  and  carpet 
importing  house  of  Nahigian  Brothers,  122  ^^'abash  avenue. 

The  arboral  decorations  are  by  courtesy  of  \'aughn's 
Seed  Store. 


We   strive    to   do 
as   we   please 


lU  meekly  Wm\^ 


Largest  Circulation 
East  of  Streeterville 


Vol.  MCAIXV 


Wednesday,  May  26 


No.  41144 


ROBBERY  ON  MAIN  ST. 

It  becomes  a  sad  duty  to  re- 
port a  felonious  act  done  in 
broad  daylight  right  in  the 
heart  of  our  usually  peaceful 
and  law  obiding  community. 
When  Perce  Millar  was  about 
to  close  his  well  known  and 
justly  highly  respected  grocery 
at  the  corner  of  Main  St.  and 
Radonovitz  alley  on  Sat.,  he 
counted  the  eggs  that  were  on 
display  outside  the  store  and 
found  that  seven  were  stolen. 
He  is  anxious  that  the  thief  or 
dishonest  person  who  abstracted 
them  be  apprehended  or  ar- 
rested. Fred  Squibbs,  who  keeps 
the  Simian  Feed  Store  next 
door,  is  malicious  enough  to  say 
the  eggs  hatched  and  wandered 
off  into  the  wide,  wide  world. 
Such  is  a  jealous  disposition. 


EXTRA!!! 


HOME  GROWN 
PERSONALS 

Farmer,  cowboy,  soldier  and 
actor.  Col.  William  Lightfoot 
Visscher.  the  genial  host  of  the 
Oltimers'  Inn,  says  he  is  going 
to  write  some  poetry  some  day 
and  have  it  printed.  Good  luck. 
Col.  Go  to  it.  There's  never 
any  telling  what  one  can  do  till 
one  tries.  The  Col.  is  the 
youngest  man  in  spirit  of  all 
our  acquaintance  —  that's  no 
joke. 


Fred  Pelham  says  the  dif  be- 
tween a  second  hand  thing  and 
an  antique  thing  depends  largely 
whether  it  is  alive  or  not  and 
which  sex.     Get  him? 


The  appointment  of  Col.  Phil 
Holland  as  chief  of  police  gives 
general  satisfaction.  He  is  pass- 
ing a  subscription  paper  asking 
contributions  for  a  new  silver 
star,  the  one  he  is  now  wearing 
belonging  to  the  ex-chief  which 
is  all  bent  up  and  badly  chewed 
by  a  vicious  goat  who  he  was 
trying   to  apprehend. 


The  man  with  his  head  in  the 
air  had  better  watch  out  for 
open  coal  holes. 


Buy  your  groceries  and  other 
household  luxuries  of  Percy 
Miller,  the  one-sided,  one-priced 
grocer.  Also  coffees,  teas,  su- 
gar and   cooking  whisky. 


Just  as  ■we  are  going  to  press  there  comes 
a  rumor  that  the  King  of  the  Dark  Cham- 
ber is  all  lit  up.  Rather  than  cast  any 
reflection  on  his  majesty  or  cast  anything 
at  the  cast  itself,  we  will  have  the  rumor 
verified  or  confirmed,  or  whatever  it  should 
be.  The  WRIGGLE  never  prints  any- 
thing but  the  truth,  the  half  truth  and  the 
naked  truth. 


Eugene  Skinkle  is  putting  in 
a  new  board  sidewalk  from  his 
back  kitchen  door  to  the  wood- 
shed. Nothing  too  good  for 
Gene,  and  damthexpense. 
*     *     * 

The  Rt.  Rev.  Preston  Brad- 
ley will  preach  at  the  Wilson 
.\v.  chapel  next  Sun.  It  will  be 
his  last  serious  sermon  before 
his  departure  for  the  two  Cali- 
fornia expositions.  He  has  been 
appointed  chaplain  to  the  Na- 
tional Editorial  Association  dur-t 
ing  their  trip  and  convention  at 
San  Fran.  We  can  stand  Brad's 
preaching  quite  well  when  he 
don't  try  to  wake  us  up. 

Frank  W.  Smith,  Secy,  of  the 
little  Corn  E.xchange  Bank,  is 
thinking  some  of  buying  a  cam- 
era and  taking  some  pictures. 
He  says  he  always  did  have  a 
hankering  to  do  some  photo- 
graphing some  time. 

Freddy  Partridge  is  going  to 
speak  a  piece  at  the  Third 
Floor  Debating  Society.  It  is 
entitled  "Deuces  Wild  and 
Tame." 

E.  H.  Xorris  was  a  visitor  to 
our  office  and  renewed  his  sub- 
scription. Come  again,  Eb,  and 
bring  your  fair  missus  with  you. 
E.  H.  and  his  wife  were  the 
first  returners  from  the  war 
zone  when  things  bust  loose 
abroad. 

Ham  Lewis  hasn't  been 
around  these  diggins  much 
since  he  shed  the  "J."  Whus- 
ser  matter.  Ham?  Too  much 
ham   &,  eh? 

Fresh   Bait  at  the  Red  Front. 


Miss  Isodine  De  Lanie  until 
recently  cook  lady  at  the  Kis- 
met boarding  house  on  Soak- 
wood  Boulevard,  wishes  us  to 
deny  the  statement  that  she 
was  fired;  the  fact  being  that 
her  services  were  dispensed  with 
— merely   that. 


Mrs.  Van  W.  writes  from  the 
farm  that  all  the  pickles  she  put 
up  last  fall  have  turned  sour. 
Perhaps  somebody  with  a  sour 
disposition  made  faces  at  them. 


Dr.  Milton  Franque,  dentist, 
3'j  blocks  from  the  Masonic. 
Concrete  filling  and  stumps  dy- 
namited. High  and  low  bridge 
work  done.  Hot  and  cold  air 
used.  Send  your  measurements 
and  I  will  send  you  a  set  by 
mail.     Fits   guaranteed. 


Stan  Mitchell  has  been  ap- 
pointed Dog  Commissioner  un- 
der  the   new   administration. 


Buy  your  muzzles  at  Bert 
Pratt's  Dog  Biscuit  Bazar. 
Nothing  over  ten  cents.  Some- 
thing new  in  shelf  paper  and 
other  kinds.  Strictly  cash  or 
credit. 


Geo.  Weber  has  just  returned 
from  a  trip  around  the  world 
and  the  loop.  He  says  he  saw 
many  sights,  some  of  them  al- 
most strange. 


Miss  Flossie  Flosser.  who  has 
been  boarding  at  the  swell  De 
Jour,  has  went.  She  says  the 
landlady's  husband  tried  to  hide 
in  her  room  every  time  the  din- 
ner dishes  had  to  be  washed. 


VILLAGE   HAPS   AND 
MISHAPS 

Expert  Ring  Lardner  ref- 
ereed  the  boxing  match  out  at 
George  Wiggs'  barn  Thursday. 
We  are  waiting  for  the  harrow- 
ing details  to  be  brought  in. 
Harry  Moir  is  still  running  the 
hotel  here.  Room  and  bath  60 
and  7.5  cents,  meals  extra. 

Our  By  Wms.  had  a  piece  in 
a  Warsaw  (Ind.)  paper  shortly 
ago.  If  he  keeps  on  with  his 
lit.  and  practical  talent  some  day 
he  will  be  earning  money  at  it. 
-Advertise  in  The  Wriggle. 

Doc  Frank  Lydston  Sundayed 
at  Mike  Girten's.  He  reports 
the  medical  and  surgery  busi- 
ness fine. 

Bert  Listerine  Taylor  has  got 
steady  employment  advertising 
the  Ford  automobile  motor 
cars.  He  is  doing  well  and  de- 
serves to.  He  has  took  desk 
room  over  the  cemetery  office. 
W.  A.  Patterson  is  working  on 
the  auction  bridge. 

Doc  Frank,  the  painful  den- 
tist, was  in  town  today.  He  was 
showing  a  fine  line  of  new 
bridges  and  fillings.  He  says 
there  is  a  perfect  epidemic  of 
toothaching  out  his  way,  and  if 
business  keeps  on  he  will  give 
us  a  fine  advertising  contract 
some  daj-.     Here's  hoping.  Doc. 

P.  S. — Doc  Frank  reports  that 
Charley  Schlytern,  out  his  way, 
bit  into  a  silver  dollar  so  hard 
the  other  day,  to  see  if  it  was 
good,  that  he  broke  a  wisdom 
tooth,  which  Doc  had  to  fix. 
The  bill  was  said  to  be  $3.75. 
Better  to  have  took  in  a  bad  dol- 
lar.  Charley. 

Jim  .\bbott  has  gone  to  Frisco 
to  report  the  meeting  of  the  In- 
ternational Rhum  Flayers'  .-Asso- 
ciation. He  will  also  read  a  pa- 
per by  the  Hon.  Billy  Knox  on 
Simian  Playing  vs.  Ledrized 
Holdouts. 


Don't  tell  your  troubles  to  a 
policeman  (in  this  here  town), 
unless  you  want  to  get  run  in. 
Tell  'em  to  us.  We'll  sympa- 
thize w-ith  you  and  try  to  get 
you  to  advertise  'em. 


THE  BOOK  OF  THE  PRESS  CLUB  SHOW 


The  Weekly  Wriggle 


"The  Worst  Is  Ye 
Entered    as    tenth-clas 


Published  semi-occasionallv  by  The 
Wriggle  Printing  and  Hand  Laundry 
Co.,    Incorporated. 


CHARLES    LEDERER. 

Editor    and    Janitor. 

Office  up  two  flights  over  the  harnei 

shop.       Branch    office,    26    North    Dea 


Advertising  rates  strictly  confidential 
and  up  to  date. 

Contributions  if  accepted  will  be  paid 
for  by  the  day,  week  or  month. 

Subscription,  $1.49  per  annum,  or 
what    have    you  ?      Garden    and    poultry 

All  checks  and  other  contributions 
miist  be  signed  with  the  writer's  real 
name.  We  also  do  cobbling  and  carpet 
beating  on  request. 

No    connection    v 
licatioi 


TO    OUR    HIFALUTIN 
CONTEMPS 

W'f  ain't  never  pertended  to 
be  a  litrary  cuss,  but  we  are  just 
as  well  satisfied  as  it  is.  We'd 
ruther  be  able  to  root  a  piece  of 
news  out  of  its  lair  and  give  to 
an  ever  confiding  public  in  our 
own  understandable  language. 
The  editor  of  Sundale  Spook 
says  we  are  illiterate.  S'pose  we 
are!  They  never  sent  no  one 
to  jale  for  being  illitrate  or  for 
not  being  able  to  spell  pusylani- 
mus  correctly,  did  they?  But  we 
hustle  for  news  and  get  it,  while 
the  editor  of  the  Spook  is  wear- 
ing the  very  life  out  of  his  cane- 
seated  swivel  office  chair  spin- 
ning out  Addisonian  (whatever 
that  is)  phrases  that  no  one  but 
a  LL.D.  or  a  B.A.  just  gradu- 
ated, can  understand.  Just  writ- 
ing fine  and  not  saying  no  noth- 
ing don't  make  a  hit  with  us, 
nohow.  We'd  ruther  have  folks 
say.  "Say,  that  was  a  interestin' 
bit  of  news  you  printed  last 
week  about  so  and  so,"  than  to 
have  old  Highbrow  Neverpay 
slap  me  on  the  back  saying, 
"I  want  to  congratulate  you  on 
the  erudition  and  all  around 
profoundness  of  your  criticism 
of  the  Odes  of  the  Belhakers  of 
the  Ungeuptorean  period,  but 
what,  old  chap,  was  it  all 
about?" 

Fine  writing  and  no  sense  be 

but  what  we  were  about  to 

remark  was.  when  in  doubt  re- 
new your  subscription  to  the 
Weekly  Wriggle. 


We  are  still  wondering  what 
Milton  Hart's  new  machine  is 
like.  Rumor  has  it  that  it's  a 
,  but  we  could  never  be- 
lieve anything  quite  as  bad  as 
that. 


A   RETRACTIVE   APOLOGY 

We  Wish  to  Make  Public  Re- 
traction of  our  statement  Last 
Week  that  Bean  Haslik,  the 
Frog-faced  editor  of  the  Bung- 
town  Budget,  Resembled  the 
Third  Wart  on  the  Tail  of  a 
Weak  Minded  Abyssinian  Wart 
Hog.  After  Careful  Reflection 
and  Careful  Inspection  We  are 
Constrained  to  Say  that  our 
steamed  and  parboiled  co'tempt- 
orary  resembles  the  FOURTH 
Wart  on  the  left  ear  of  said 
Abyssmian  animal. 

Hoping  that  this  will  set  us 
right  with  the  amiable  and 
senile  gent,  we  take  this  oppor- 
tunity of  renewing  to  him  the 
assurance  of  a  continuance  of 
our   distinguished   consideration. 


We  defer  expressing  our 
choice  or  preference  in  the  mat- 
ter of  the  candidates  for  the 
various  judicial  positions  at  the 
coming  election,  June  7,  until 
we  hear  from  our  advertising 
department.  It  is  all  right  put- 
ting a  cross  on  the  ballot,  but 
our  second  best  motto  is  COME 
A  CROSS.  A  hint  to  the  wise 
is  as  good  as  a  bat  on  the  ear. 


BETTER  NEVER  THAN 
LATE 

He  hurries  in  with  manner  gay, 

Urged    by    an    evil    fate. 
"The    six-fifteen    was    'bridged'    today." 

He  says,  "and   so  I'm  late!" 

And    then   life   seems   a  total    loss. 

The  art  of  lying  vain, 
When  coldly  speaks  his  frowning  boss: 

"Yes:-     I  was  on  that  train!" 


Select  people  should  use  Swift's  wool 
soap   exclusively. 


The    sure    things    usually    are 
the   other  feller's. 


APPROACHING    INFLICTIONS. 


saving  much  time  and  postage — that. 
Providence  and  collections  permitting, 
he  will  visit,  annoy  and  pester  the  fol- 
lowing non-resident  members  of  the 
Press  Club  of  Chicago  during  his  bet- 
ter-half-conducted trip  to  the  two  coast 
expositions  {under  escort  of  the  Na- 
tional Editorial  Association) : 

Paul   Howse,   California. 

Justin  Brown.  California,  late  of  the 
Capper  publications. 

Frank    Weatherbee.    artist,    California. 

Dr.   Elmore  Pettyjohn.  Topeka,  Kans. 

Mark    Watson,    San    Diego. 

Henry   Lord    C>a.v,   California. 

Et  al.,  and  then  some,  including  also 
the  following  persons,  to-wit: 

Lou    Bedford,    San    Francisco. 

Cramer    Shattuc.    Portland. 

Tom  Prior,  Los  -'\ngeles. 

Russell  J.    Waters,  Redlands. 

S.   M.  Allen,  Denver. 

Mrs.  Fanny  A.  Mitchell,  Grey's  Peak. 

John  W.    Carson,   Colorado. 


A  NEW  BARN  IS  BEING 
BUILT 

Frank  Soc.  Roderus  has  built 
another  barn  for  the  $T.6oO  au- 
tomobile he  is  thinking  of  buy- 
ing. Tom  Donnelly,  the  Dia- 
mond Merchant  in  the  Press 
Club  Building,  who  acted  as 
Mr.  Roderus'  lawyer  in  the 
transaction,  examined  the  title 
and  pronounced  it  all  right  ex- 
cept for  a  few  flaws,  which 
would  never  be  noticed  except 
in  a  strong  light. 


NEWSPAPER  BORES 

The    man    who    has    a    little    joke 
He   wishes   you    to    print 

Will   sit  down  softly   by  your  side- 
He    never    takes   a   hint; 

.'\nd  while  you  wish  that  he  was  in- 
Well,  Hades — for  you  do — 

He'll   whisper  gently    that  he  has 
The  very  thing  for  you. 

And    when    you    tell    him    that    it's 

To    print    it   would    not    pay; 
He'll   look  at  you  contemptuously, 

As  much  as  if  to  say: 
"Well,  this  man  thinks  he  knows  wh 
what, 

But  if  I  could  not  run 
A  better  paper  than  he  does, 

I'd  quit  and  buy  a  gun," 


The 


A'ho 


take 


A  peep,   and   that  is  all. 
At    your    exchanges,    "now    and    then," 

Impresses  you  with  gall; 
But   when    he  hangs  around    all    day 

And  reads  and  looks  quite  bland. 
It  makes  you   swear;    in   fact,   it's  more 

Than  any  man  can  stand. 

Likewise,  the  man  who   has   a  boy 

From  one  year  old  to  ten, 
"The  smartest  youngster   ever  born," 

Will  drop  in  now  and  then. 
And  when  you   fail  to  print    the   things 

That   little  kid  has  said. 
He'll    keep    right  at  you   all    the   time 

L'ntil  you  wish  you're  dead. 


Then  there's  the  fiend  with 

Who    loves  you  most  to   death, 
Who    wants   to    read   his   little    "screec 

Before  you  catch  your  breath. 
And    when    you    give    it   back    to    him 

For  reasons  that  are  plain. 
He  begs  and   begs  you  to   peruse 

It  over   once  again. 

When  earth  is  left  behind  and  we 

Have  shuffled  off  this  coil, 
I    wonder  if  we'll   meet   up    there. 

Upon  that  golden  soil. 
The    bores    that    I    have   mentioned,    ar 

The  others  that  we  know? 
For  if  we  should  I'm  very  sure 

I   do   not   care  to  go. 

—-Tom  Massou. 


ipt. 


Mel  Sykes,  the  popular  maker 
of  fine  fotos  has  gone  up  at  last 
— gone  up  to  the  'steenth  floor 
of  the  Stevens  block  on  the  Wa- 
bash turnpike  just  north  of  the 
Madison  road.  Mel  made  a  fac- 
simile of  the  facial  structure  of 
the  editor  of  this  aggregation  of 
illumination  and  bile  once,  and 
a  fair  lady  gazed  upon  the  pic- 
ture and  remarked,  "Isn't  it 
wonderful  what  a  good  photog- 
rapher can  do."  And  the  worst 
of  it  all  was  that  she  meant  it. 


MEN'S  FASHION  NOTES 

The  Muskegon  papers  say 
that  clothes  will  again  be  the 
proper  thing  for  street  wear 
this  summer. 

Men's  trousers  will  still  be  in 
\'Ogue,  with  lace  insertion  at  the 
knee   near   the  hip  pocket. 

Mayor  Thompson  has  issued 
a  proclamation  to  the  effect  that 
ear  muffs  may  be  now  discard- 
ed  even    in    our   best   circles. 

A  much  better  face  lotion 
than  can  be  bought  in  any  drug 
store  for  ninety  cents  is  pre- 
pared as  follows:  Glue  1  oz., 
one  egg  (at  present  prices  a 
fresh  one  may  be  used),  J4 
lemon  cream  pie,  ^  can  Old 
Dutch  Klenser,  2  oz.  vitriol  and 
a  stewed  prune,  flavor  to  taste. 
It   may  be    served  hot   or   cold. 

If  you  find  hair  in  the  butter, 
don't  give  the  butter  a  sham- 
poo, but  shave  it  with  the  grain. 

Shoes  will  be  largely  worn  on 
the  feet.  Gentlemen  with  valets 
are  ordering  the  breed  of  shoes 
that  lace  at  the  back. 

Men's  swagger  dress  suits  for 
the  summer  will  be  cut  with  a 
large  "V"  in  the  back  and  front 
and  will  be  entirely  sleeveless. 
The  more  pronounced  styles 
show  the  vest  cut  higher  on  one 
side  than  on  the  other.  Our 
Mr.  John  Gorman  says  that  the 
chinchilla  stripes  on  the  sides 
of  trousers  will  be  worn  more 
than  ever. 

A  very  pretty  combination 
belt  and  suspenders  is  (or  are) 
being  shown.  The  belt  is  lined 
with  glue  to  ensure  further  sta- 
bility. 

Panama  hats  with  detachable 
cuffs  are  no  longer  de  trop. 
However,  the  hats  and  cuffs 
should  be  laundered  separately, 
the  latter  without  starch.  Char- 
ley Dowst  of  the  National 
Laundry  Journal  is  authority 
for   this. 

By  the  way,  there  is  this  dif- 
ference between  a  feller  and  a 
fellow.  A  feller  is  an  ordinary 
mortal  and  a  fellow  is  one  who 
wears  a  wide  silk  ribbon  to 
keep  his  eye-glasses  attached  to 
himself.  *     *     * 

There  is  nothing  that  ever 
made  us  feel  more  "put  out" 
than  when  our  boarding  house 
lady  told  us  we  "needn't  come 
'round  no  more.'' 


THE  BOOK  OF  THE  PRESS  CLUB  SHOW 


Cbe  meekly  Ulriggle 


EXTRY 
EXTRA! 


Fire   Feind's 
Frightful  Toll 


EXTRA 
EXTRY! 


Last  night  the  rapacious  fire  feind  stalked  through  our 
devoted  town  doing  monstrous  damage  to  one  of  our  most 
highly  respected  and  terribly  afflicted  citizens,  a  subscriber  for 
nearly  fifteen  years. 

Just  as  the  moon  was  sinking  in  luxurious  silence  behind 
the  tall  poplars  at  the  end  of  Main  St.,  probably  about  1  a.  m.. 
a  faint  glow  might  have  been  seen  in  Jan  Jinsen's  tailor  shop. 
Above  it,  camly,  unwontedly  camly.  sleeping  was  Henry  Hup- 
penfiiller.  who  was  batching  it  in  the  second  floor  of  that  two- 
story  and  basement  edifice. 

He  swelled  smoke,  Henry  did. 

Quicker  than  the  eye,  Henry  dressed  and  busted  out  to  the 
street  and  give  the  alarm.  Fire !  Fire !  he  hissed  shrilly, 
hoarsely. 

Gene  Alorgan,  our  illustrious  fire  department,  heard  that 
alarm  and  soon  was  seen  on  the  scene,  fully  equipped  for  the 
fray,  hemlet  on  head,  fire  ax  in  one  hand  and  his  famous  and 
far  reaching  sterling  silver-plated  trumpet  in  the  other  {  hand  ) . 

In  the  meantime  the  fire  was  fully  under  way  and  the 
bright  empirium  canopy  of  heaven  was  lighted  up  with  the 
crimson  tint  of  the  all-devouring  destroyer.  Smoke  poured 
out  of  that  tailor  shop  in  dense  serrated  but  inflamatory  col- 
umns. 

At  least  a  full  score  of  white  faced  citizens — male  and 
female — and  the  town  marshall  were  soon  on  the  scene,  includ- 
ing the  all  pervading  representative  of  the  press  in  the  person 
of  the  Wriggle  reporter. 

The  damage  was  awfull.  A  pair  of  splendid  dress  pants, 
the  joint  property  of  Louis  and  Edgar  Blum,  were  already 
smouldering  and  rapidly  approaching  a  total  loss.  They  had 
unfortunately  been  left  to  be  pressed  only  the  day  before.  In 
the  luidst  of  peace  we  know  not  what  is  before  us.  Mert 
Wieland's  prize  sack  suit  (the  one  he  wore  at  his  v.-idding  a 
week  ago),  almost  ready  for  delivery  after  pressing,  Vvas 
consumed  by  the  insatiable  feind.  Words  fail  us  in  ex- 
pressing our  deep  sympathy  with  the  losers  -ind  llieir 
friends  and  relatives. 

If  it  had  not  had  been  for  our  splendid  fire  department 
much  more  damage  would  have  been  did.  As  it  is  the  damage, 
not  counting  the  building  and  lot,  was  $163.75,  which  was  not 
insured  and  which  will  fall  on  Mr.  Jinsen  and  his  erstwhile 
merry  but  discriminating  and  exclusive  customers. 

It  took  just  one  hour  and  tw-enty  minutes  for  the  stately 

structure  of  the  Jinsen  tailor  shop  to  become  a  mass  of  charred 

rafters,  window  sills,  door  frames,  mop  boards,  two-by-fours, 

etc  etc  etc.     Had  it  not  been  for  the  heroicness  of  the  noble 

fire  chief.  Gene  Morgan,  tlie  place  would  have  burned  down 

in  45  minutes. 

Editor's  Xote — The  above  description  was  written  by  our  little  cub 
reporter  Gilinan  Parker  who,  being  short,  could  not  see  above  the 
heads  of  the  crowds.  So  he  had  to  return  to  the  Wrinkle  office  al- 
most as  short  of  particulars  as  he  is  himself.  .Also  being  so  late  and 
we  going  to  press  we  didn't  have  no  time  to  read  copy  and  make  the 
usual  corrections  because  we  aim  to  retain  the  Wrixkle's  unexampled 
reputation  for  being  fussy  about  grammar  and  our  Englisli  and  spelling 
and  punkchating  are  such.  But  in  the  hasty  excitement  we  have  mis- 
lade  our  dicktioner>'  and  are  laboring  at  a  disadvantage  on  this  acct. 
Be  sides  when  laboring  under  great  excitement  we  are  all  more  nr  less 


apt  to  get  our  language  all  mussed  up.  .And  moreover,  be  sides,  even 
at  this  late  moment  we  are  requested  to  apologize  to  Oilman's  mother, 
Mrs.  Mar}'  Moncure  Parker,  for  keeping  her  boy  out  so  late,  he  being 
used  to  going  to  bed  one  or  two  hours  after  supper  time.  "I  did  not 
raise  my  boy  to  be  a  night  owl!"  hollered  she,  sobbingly.  With  these 
few  facts  we  close  the  discussion  and  the  forms. 

Too  Late  to  Classify 

Jensen   The  Phoenix  T^//lor 
Clothes  &  lulls   m&dt  to  oFc/er  or  on  hand 

New  Stock  nEw  location  New  StYles 
new  PRices  To  sUit  ALL  w/th  5uitS  mr. 
Jen  JeNsen  having  RenTerf 

TVeW  quarTers 

m  front  oF  the  non-5uch  LiveRy  St- 
ables 

IS  prepareD  to  Meet  aLL  CuStomerf 
aS  of  Old.  the  /aTe  hoLocost  don't  afFeCt 
the  pr/ceS  of  my  gOods,  patrOnIzE  Jens- 
en thl  firepRooi  Tailor.  rEpaiRinG  & 
pressing. 


PURELY    PERSONAL 

Charley  Gotthart.  late  of  the 
"World's  Greatest"  staff  is  try- 
ing to  wean  Jimmy  Durkin,  Esq., 
of  the  Trib.,  from  a  growing 
desire  to  play  the  game  of  rhum 
or  rummy,  whichever  the  soul 
destroying  game  is. 
*     *     * 

Secretary  George  Schlosser 
of  the  National  Editorial  As- 
sociation writes  us  that  Arthur 
Glessner  is  going  on  the  trip  to 
Sar  Francisco  and  San  Diego. 
.\rthur  will  be  the  life  and  sole 
of  the  trip  and  a  joy  to  all  be- 
Holders  with  that  gorgeous 
new   black   moustache    of   his. 


The  editor  has  been  invited 
to  address  the  Juggville  Y.  M. 
G.  .\.  on  the  evils  of  Rumdiiyl. 

Frank  Kipfer  promised  us  a 
pome  for  this  issue,  but  we 
guess  it  got  sidetracked  or  the 
meter  got  wrong  or  something, 
so  we  got  to  go  without  it,  and 
some  evil-minded  person  or 
persons  might  say  we  don't 
miss  much.  Nevertheless  Frank 
is  our   faverit   pnte. 


Sam  Small,  of  the  Examiner, 
never  tried  to  save  a  soul  and 
very  seldom  lays  up  a  cent 
some  days,  at  least  so  we  are 
informed  by  his  industrious  and 
illustrious  confrere  and  biog- 
rapher, R.  C.  Cornell.  (Con- 
frere means  that  he  works  on 
the   same  paper.) 

*     *     * 

Dave  C.  Clarkson  is  thinking 
of  putting  in  a  line  of  books  in 
addition  to  other  stock  in  his 
general  store.  Look  out,  Dave, 
don't  branch  out  too  fast.  Most 
every  family  has  got  a  book 
already.  It  don't  pay  to  have 
a  lot  of  goods  on  hand  that  you 
can't  maybe  never  sell — 
UNLESS  YOU  ADVERTISE 
IN  THE  WEEKLY  WRIG- 
GLE. 

Envious  and  sordid  minded 
persons  are  poking  fun  at  j-e 
ed.  because  he  cut  the  brush  off 
his  upper  lip.  If  said  persons 
would  mind  their  own  business 
and  not  try  to  make  ye  ed.'s 
wife  think  she's  married  to  a 
man  who  is  the  exact  counter- 
part of  a  Sardinian  train  robber 
we'd  be  everlastingly  sufficient- 
Iv   nhliged. 


OUR  WATCHES 

are  guaranteed  to  last  a  lifetime,  if  you  don't 
live    too    long.     For   sale    at 

THE  FEED  STORE  RESTAURANT 

Eat  at  our  place,  but  die  happy  at  home. 


12 


THE  BOOK  OF  THE  PRESS  CLUB  SHOW 


Cbe  (UeeKly  Ulriggle 


SHROYERVILLE    CORRE- 
SPONDENCE 

Our  well  known  undertaker 
Walt  Washburne  was  to  have 
given  a  fish  chowder  dinner  last 
Wednesday.  Fifteen  invitations 
were  out  and  a  good  time  would 
have  been  had  by  all.  but  Stan 
Mitchell  who  runs  the  popular 
meat,  fish  and  hair  dressing  es- 
tablishment on  Main  street  was 
all  out  of  fish  all  week,  so  the 
dinner  was  called  off  after  the 
guests  had  arrived.  Among 
those  present  was  Walter  Wood 
and  all  his  family  and  the  fam- 
ily preacher  and  a  dozen  others. 

Rudy  Berliner  gave  a  bass 
drum  solo  on  the  village  green 
Sat. 

Lawyer  John  A.  Brown  went 
hunting  last  Tues.,  but  didn't 
have  much  luck.  He  shot  Frank 
Comerfords  cow  near  the  black- 
bury  patch.  Comerford  has 
hired  Squire  Geo.  S.  Foster  to 
have  the  law  on  him  if  he  don't 
pay  for  the  damage  done  that 
cow.  Better  luck  next  time, 
John.  The  cow  is  said  to  be 
not  giving  as  good  milk  as  per 
usual. 

Milton  Hart  has  got  a  auto- 
mobile. Nobody  hain't  seen  it 
yet  as  he  is  practicing  it  all  by 
him  self  in  the  back  lots  till  the 
automobile  gets  used  to  him.  It 
is  said  to  be  some  larger  than  a 
ford. 

Thurber  N.  Gushing  was  a 
Shroyerville  visitor  last  week. 
He  is  taking  up  music  and 
voice  culture  under  instruction 
of  Prof.  Richard  Henry  Little 
at    his    home    town. 

Gol.  Will  G.  Edens  was  way 
down  to  New  York  and  has  re- 
turned. He  states  he  nearly 
saw  a  man  of  war  cruiser  in  the 
bay  or  river  at  that  great  me- 
tropolis. 

Banker-Poet  Harry  Ashley 
has  wrote  some  more  poetry, 
but  your  cor.  hain't  read  it  yet. 
There's  some  days  we  can  read 
poetry  and  there's  some  days  we 
can't.  We  got  to  be  feeling 
right  well  when  we  do. 

Dr.  Wm.  Fredk.  Nutt,  dealer 
in  gimcracks,  real  Ann  Teek 
curios  and  umbrellas  as  low  as 
$1.  Up  stairs  in  the  Stevens 
block  State  street  near  the  Mad- 
ison road.  The  motto  of  his 
goods  is,  "Age  is  no  disgrace." 

Jim  Lowder  went  to  pay  his 
respects  to  Reporter  Wieland 
of  the  Herald  and  his  bride  of 
a  week  the  other  evening  and 
on  coming  away  from  the  Wie- 
land residence  was  promptly 
pinched  by  an  overvigilant  cop- 


per who  thought  he  was  getting 
away  with  some  of  the  gorgus 
wedding  presents.  The  police- 
man frisked  Jim  to  see  what  he 
had  on  him  and  finding  noth- 
ing let  him  go.  Jim  says  he  is 
glad  he   resisted   temptation. 

Opie  Read  and  Will  Visscher 
are  thinking  of  opening  a  regu- 
lar book,  vegetable  and  station- 
ary store  out  at  Three-and-a- 
half  corners.  They  expect  to  do 
a  good  business  as  there  are  sev- 
eral debating  and  .Shakespeare 
societies  and  clubs  out  that 
way.  We  wish  'em  success  not- 
withstanding our  doubts. 
*     *     * 

Harry  Shroyer,  the  founder 
of  this  place  was  offered  a  job 
canvassing  for  a  New  York 
book  concern  last  week.  He  is 
finding  out  if  the  concern  is  re- 
sponsible before  accepting  the 
job.  It  pays  to  be  cautious. 
Harry  is  said  to  have  been  bit 
quite  bad  recently  while  can- 
vassing for  "The  Lives  of  the 
Great    Mayors." 


The  man  with  settled  ways 
often  does  it  on  a  basis  of  ten 
cents  on  the  dollar,  says  Harry 
Barton  Bogg,  the  well-known 
South  Side  philosopher  and 
packing  house  man. 


BACK  AGAIN,  AGAIN, 
AGAIN 

Here  I  am  in  town  once  more, 
and,  like  a  mariner  ashore,  I'm 
doing  all  that  can  be  done  to 
get  my  share  of  any  fun  that 
may  be  going  on  in  this  ador- 
able metropolis.  For,  after  all 
is  said  and  done,  there's  not  a 
single  place — not  one — on  all 
the  earth  (so  note  it  down)  that 
can  compete  with  this  old  town. 
And,  like  that  mariner  absurd, 
to  whom  I  have  above  referred, 
whose  sum  of  stipulated  pay 
accumulates  while  he's  away; 
and  who,  as  soon  as  he's  re- 
turned to  claim  the  wages  he 
has  earned,  and  feels  the  locker 
full  of  shot,  proceeds  at  once 
to  blew  the  lot;  so  I,  who  take 
my  yearly  trip  by  road,  or  rail, 
or  creaky  ship,  and  spend  a  por- 
tion of  my  wealth  in  laying  in 
a  stock  of  health,  as  soon  as  I 
return  to  town  (just  tinted  to 
a  pleasant  brown)  I  hasten — 
need  it  be  explained? — disburs- 
ing quickly  all  I've  gained.  I 
rush  wherever  pleasure  calls,  to 
theatres  and  music  halls,  to 
clubs,  to  spots  where  beauty 
throngs,  to  swimming  baths 
and  restzuTongs — in  short,  from 
morning    until    late,    in    every- 


thing participate  by  which  I  can 
express  my  joy  at  being  here 
once  more,  my  boy.  For,  what- 
soever be  the  dream  indulged 
by  other  folks,  the  cream  of 
holidays,  I  will  maintain,  con- 
sists in  getting  back  again. 

B.  U.  T. 


LOCAL    NEWS 

The  Rogers-Hall  Company 
are  figuring  on  putting  in  a 
steam  printing  press. 

John  Fay,  the  well  knownst 
antiquarium.  is  writing  a  sce- 
nario for  a  moving  picture  play 
in  which  he  introduces  some 
soundless  Abyssinian  folk  songs. 
The  crooning  is  shown  by  the 
movements  of  the  actor's  lips. 
The  road  to  success  is  to  ad- 
vertise in  the  Weekly  Wriggle. 

The  Continental  and  Com- 
mercial National  Bank  are 
thinking  of  putting  in  an  extra 
paying  teller,  making  three  in 
all.  This  is  getting  to  be  some 
commercial   center. 

Expressing  done  reliable  and 
cheap.  Apply  to  Bill  Gourlay 
across  from  the  Palace  Barber 
Shop. 

Ed  Clipson,  who  runs  the 
delicatessen  store  and  pressing 
club  on  Debun  street,  is  putting 
in  some  shower  baths  for  the 
benefit  of  those  who  wait  while 
the  pressing  is  being  done.  .\lso 
he  is  having  the  south  walls 
frescoed  in  natural  water  col- 
ors. 

Horlick's      milk      shakers      at 
Doc  Hoelscher's  drug  store. 
*     *     * 

Old  Doc  J.  L.  Quinlan  has 
been  busy  pulling  some  old 
stumps  on  his  place  out  at  Cal- 
umet. 

They  take  everything  out  e.x- 
cept  the  buttonholes  at  Charley 
Dowst's  laundry  on  Ann  street. 
One  trial  will  suffice. 


Paul  W'illiams,  who  does  the 
-\ssociated  Press  at  Springfield, 
Sundayed  here  with  a  charming 
new  suit  on.  It  is  a  perfect  fit, 
all  except  the  coat,  pants  and 
vest.  Paul  is  getting  to  be  quite 
a  dude  and  speaks  of  'em  as 
"trousers." 

Charley  Comisky  has  a  fine 
line  of  bats,  baseballs  and  other 
paraphernalia   on   sale   now. 

Our  very  own  Ed  Maher  is 
running  on  the  non-partisan 
ticket  for  circuit  judge.  Cook 
County,  State  of  Illinois,  U.  S. 
of  North  America,  amen.  Aside 
from  the  fact  that  he  is  presi- 
dent of  the  lawyers'  association, 
is  very  good  looking  for  a  male, 
is  a  member  of  the  Board  of 
Managers  of  the  Chicago  Law 
Institute,  is  always  full  of  good 
humor,  member  of  the  Illinois 
State  Bar  Association,  is  a 
crackerjack  story  teller  and  a 
member  of  the  Chicago  Society 
of  Advocates,  we  know  nothing 
against   him. 

Get  your  bean  fitted  for  a  new 
lid  at  Senator  Grady's  store  on 
23nd  street. 

George  Lincoln,  the  well- 
known  linotype  and  stock  op- 
erator, is  busy  on  his  new  in- 
vention, an  aquatic-automobile. 
He  showed  us  the  model  the 
other  day.  Just  by  a  slight 
change  that  a  child  of  37  could 
make,  the  automobile  is  trans- 
ferred from  a  motor  car  into  a 
motor  boat.  He  is  going  to 
call  it  a  yachtomobile. 

Some  new  shirts  shown  at  the 
George  and  Fred  Dunham  Em- 
porium. 

It  is  strange  that  George 
should  have  invented  this,  as 
he  just  hates  the  sight  of  an 
automobile,  and  says  even  if  he 
should  get  rich  beyond  the 
dreams  of  average  he  would  not 


If  you  are  not  going  anywhere  in 

particular,  why  not 

use  the 

Freestone   Railroad 

JIMMY  DURKIN 

Sole  Ouncr 

Passengers  shipped  to  all  points. 

Round   and   square 

trip  tickets 


THE  BOOK  OF  THE  PRESS  CLUB  SHOW 


13 


CheUlecklv  (Uriggic 


WHAT    OUR    LOCAL    PHI- 
LOSOPHERS SAY 

Some  husbands  say  nice  things 
to  their  wives'  faces  and  others 
wait  to  saj'  'em  on  the  tomb- 
stones after  they  (the  wives, 
not  the  husbands)  are  dead. — 
From  Gems  of  Thought  by  Ed 
Ficard. 

*  *     * 

We  would  rather  have  a  well 
cooked  meal  served  on  an  oil 
cloth  covered  table  than  a  poor 
one  served  on  the  finest  damask. 
(Pat.  applied  for.) — George  C. 
Bastian. 

*  *     * 

Some     sportsmen     are     never 

fatal  to  anything  except  time. — 

John  E.  Bacon  (No  relation  to 

the  gent  who  wrote  Shakspere). 

«     *     * 

When  between  the  devil  and 
the  deep  sea  stand  pat,  says  W. 
A.  Patterson,  managing  editor 
of  the  Western  Newspaper 
Union,  who  is  stopping  at  the 
Sawdorff, 

*  *     * 

"I  know  a  man  who  has  a 
wishbone  where  his  backbone 
ought  to  be,"  says  Karl  McVitty 
in  his  "Annals  of  the  Small." 

The  feller  that  never  bites 
may  never  get  the  hook,  but  he's 
apt  to  go  hungry  some  of  the 
time. — Philosophications  of  J.  B. 
Mansfield. 

Thej'  say  lightning  won't 
strike  twice  in  the  same  place. 
That's  because  there  generally 
ain't  anything  there  worth  strik- 
ing at. — Bert  Yarwood. 

*  *     * 

There  are  two  things  that 
ain't  much  use  when  they're 
slow  and  sure — a  watch  and  a 
race  horses — Fred  S.  Miller,  late 
lamented  scribe  of  the  Publish- 
ers'   Club. 


THE  NEW  CANUTE 

By  Chris  Cross 

There  was  once  an  Emperor 
who  was  the  father  of  his 
country.  He  was  also  the 
grandmother  and  the  great-aunt 
of  his  country,  and  it  was  al- 
most more  than  his  country 
could  bear.  He  was  a  good  and 
a  brave  and  a  very  young  man, 
and  he  acted  up  to  his  lights: 
but  they  were  ancient  lights, 
and  he  was  not  much  of  an 
actor.  However,  he  did  his  best 
for  the  best  with  the  best  inten- 


tions. He  couldn't  do  more,  and 
his  country  was  very  glad — that 
he  couldn't.  He  made  the  most 
beautiful  speeches  out  of  his 
own  head,  and  let  them  off  in 
public  to  his  own  satisfaction. 
He  also  composed  his  own  mu- 
sic, and  had  it  played  by  his 
own  marine  bands,  and  it  al- 
most caused  a  revolution.  He 
brought  up  a  large  army  en- 
tirely by  hand,  and  it  did  him 
credit;  and  his  poor  but  honest 
country  paid  for  it  entirely 
through  the  nose,  and  enjoyed 
it  immensely.  He  was  very 
pleasant  and  aflfable  to  his  coun- 
try, and  was  anxious  that  his 
country  should  love  him  and 
think  well  of  his  government, 
and  his  country  tried  to  but 
thought  better  of  it,  which  was 
not    quite   the   same    thing. 

Well,  this  Emperor  had  a 
very  select  and  high-toned  no- 
bility, that  tw-ined  round  his 
throne,  and  supported  his  house, 
and  hung  upon  his  word,  and 
wore  his  livery,  and  came  at  his 
call,  and  laughed  in  his  sleeve, 
and  did  many  other  wonderful 
things  for  him.  and  on  his  be- 
half. Now,  one  day  this  supe- 
ior  but  obsequious  nobility  hap- 
pened to  mention  casually  that 
it  had  a  soul  at  home  which 
didn't  belong  to  the  Emperor. 
And  the  Emperor  was  wroth, 
and  asked  himself  to  a  dinner 
party  to  be  given  by  his  nobil- 
ity to  himself.  And  he  came  to 
the  dinner  party,  and  he  drank 
his  own  health,  and  spoke  his 
mind  to  his  nobility,  and  he  ut- 
terly denied  that  it  had  a  soul 
of  its  own.  It  was  his  soul,  and 
it  was  a  high  and  a  noble  soul, 
and  a  good  old  soul,  and  a  poor 
old  soul.  -A.nd  he  shed  tears, 
and  said  that  he  wouldn't  have 
thought  that  his  nobility  would 
have  gone  and  said  what  it  had 
said;  that  he  should  never  for- 
get it.  never,  but  that  he  for- 
gave it,  and  hoped  it  wouldn't 
occur  again.  And  he  blessed  his 
nobility,  and  called  for  another 
bottle,  and  broke  a  decanter  in 
his  earnestness.  .\nd  then  they 
all  sang  ".\uld  Lang  Syne,"  and 
were  very  happy,  especially  the 
Emperor, 

But,  although  forgiven  by  its 
Emperor,  the  nobility  couldn't 
forgive  itself.  It  felt  that  it  had 
stained  its  escutcheon,  and  it 
determined  to  wipe  away  the 
stain.  So  it  rallied  round  its 
Emperor,  and  cheered  him  up. 
and  toasted  him.  and  buttered 
him,  until  even  he  began  to  rec- 
ognize what  a  very  fine   fellow 


he  was.  At  length  his  nobility 
went  so  far  as  to  tell  him  that 
his  greatness  was  such  that  even 
the  w'aves  obeyed  him.  So  he 
sat  down  before  the  waves  of 
popular  opinion  and  ordered 
them  to  roll  back.  But,  to  his 
intense  surprise  and  annoyance, 
they  rolled  on,  and,  as  his  no- 
bility justly  said;  "How  w*ere 
they  to  know  he  couldn't 
swim?" 

.And    the    moral    is — Well,    it 
just   shows   you! 


LOCAL    BREVITIES 

A.  Milo  Bennett,  Jr.,  who  re- 
cently joined  the  .Apollo  Uncle 
Tom's  Cabin  Troupe,  is  back  in 
town.  The  company  had  real 
scenery  and  four  sure  enough 
bloodhounds.  But  at  Sudsville 
the  canines  ran  away  and  were 
caught  by  the  town  marshal 
and  put  in  the  pound.  The 
charges  for  their  board  and 
lodging  in  that  institution  ex- 
ceeded the  balance  in  the  troupe 
treasury  by  more  than  40  cents, 
so  the  company  disbanded.  A. 
Milo  is  back  at  the  old  home- 
stead on  Edgecomb  place. 

Bill  Hale  Thompson  still  has 
some  offices  to  let.  See  him  at 
the  Town  Hall. 

George  W^ashington  W^eippert 
was  in  town  yest.  with  plans  for 
a  new  moving  pict.  show  thea- 
ter. He  says  there  is  money  in 
the  business  if  you  don't  pay  the 
janitor  too  much  salary.  Mr. 
W'eippert  started  business  as  a 
gambler,  making  as  much  as 
$1.47  in  a  single  year  of  fleecing 
his  fellow  members  of  the  Press 
Club  at  a  terrible  w'icked  game 
called  rhummy,  the  "h"  being 
silent  as  in  cow. 

They  say  Carrie  Jacobs  Bond 
has  writ  some  new  songs  right 
out  of  her  own  head.  They 
should  be  heard  to  be  appreci- 
ated. 


OPERATED    ON! 

Old  Doc  .\tkinson  operated 
on  William  H.  Van  Gilder's 
farm  hand  last  week.  Doc  gave 
him  chloroform  and  then  cut 
out  tile  farm  hand's  booze.  He 
also  found  a  puncture  of  the  in- 
ner tube  and  a  loose  clutch.  It 
was  a  beautiful  operation  from 
a  professional  standpoint  and 
very  successful.  Farmer  Van 
Gilder  buried  his  farm  hand 
Tuesday   afternoon. 


BROUGHT  TO  JUSTICE 

Bill  Van  Gilder,  alias  the 
"Hammock  Farmer,"  alias  the 
"Only  Farmer  in  the  Press 
Club."  is  out  on  bonds  again. 
He  is  accused  of  bunkoing  a 
poor  innocent  guileless  unso- 
phisticated city  man  named 
Fred  Dunham,  who  came  to 
this  town  to  despose  of  his  crop 
of  wild  oats.  Well,  anyway. 
Bill  is  accused  of  trying  to  sell 
Mr.  Dunham  the  town  pump, 
show  him  the  hole  in  the  wall 
and  induce  him  to  go  over  to 
Charley  Smith's  place  and  see 
the  silo  go  'round.  Judge  George 
M.  Weichelt,  in  holding  Bill 
over  to  the  grand  Jewry,  says  a 
example  must  be  made  of  such 
men  who  take  advantage  of  the 
sucker  within  our  gates.  Chief 
of  Police  Phil  Holland,  who 
made  the  arrest,  says  he  is  go- 
ing to  clean  up  the  town  so 
that  it  will  be  safe  for  the  big- 
gest mut  that  ever  came  out 
of  Chicago.  Take  politics  out 
of  the  police  and  what  have 
you?  is  the  slogan  of  our  new 
administration. 


Gladiolus  Bulbs 

Our  "Princeps"  wonderful  decorative  scarlet  "Ruffled."  the  New 
Class  Vaughan's  "Rainbow"  Mixed,  each  different  Parisian  Blue 
and  Lavender  our  introduction — most  of  these  not  obtainable 
elsewhere. 

Mexican   Morning   Glory  Vine 

A  most  wonderful  flowering  climber,  growing  20  to  30  feet,  in  full 
flower  daily  from  midsummer  till  frost,  pink,  lavender  color,  strong 
root,  2jC. 

Lawn  Mowers  and  Garden  Hose 

n^-^A^^  Xrtrtir.  Hoes. Rakes.  Dibbers.  Weeders. 
Garden    lOOlS    -prowels      Prunes      Cultivators 

Vl-  J         C  -ICj. Randolph  St.,  Near  Dearborn 

aUghatl    S    Oeed    OtOre  Chicago  and  New  York 

All  Flower  Seeds,  all  Vegetable  Seeds 
Complete  Planting  Booklet,  Vaughan's  Garden,  FREE 


THE   BOOK   OF  THE   PRESS   CLUB    SHOW 


Che  Uleeklv  JlUriggle 


A  NEW  GAME 

Oledoc  R.  C.  Fisher  is  writ- 
ing a  article  on  playing  golf, 
the  new  game  that  has  recentlj- 
been  invented,  &  they  say  is 
be  coming  quite  popular  al- 
though we  have  not  seen  (or 
saw)  it  (whichever  is  correct). 
They  say  golf  is  fascinating  to 
some  people  in  fact  they  be- 
come quite  infatuated  with  it. 
It  is  supposed  to  be  something 
like  outdoor  billyards  or  kelly 
pool.  Oledoc  Fisher  says  the 
game  should  not  be  played  con- 
tinnuusly  day  in  and  day  out 
including  Sundays  and  holidays 
more  than  12  or  13  hours  each 
day.  Otherwise  it  is  liable  to 
become  a  bad  babbit  or  as  he 
puts  it  a  obsession  (which  the 
doctors  say  is  incurable  they 
never  having  found  the  germ 
or  serum  for  it).  The  only 
thing  that  helps  is  a  operation 
at  an  expense  of  of  $250.00  not 
including  the   nurse   or  room. 


PROMINENT  VISITOR 

Ed  Doherty  of  the  Chgo 
Herald  local  staff  was  back  in 
town  with  his  pretty  young 
wife,  showing  her  the  skenes 
of  his  childhoot  days.  Eddie 
was  quite  flush  for  a  married 
man  and  treated  a  lot  of  the 
boys,  including  ye  editor,  to 
brown  and  white  pop  at  Doc 
G.  Frank  Lydston's  famous 
blue  front  drug  store.  Eddie 
had  a  lot  of  interesting  gossip 
about  our  townsmen's  friends 
back  in  Chgo.  He  says  among 
other  things  that  Thornton 
Smith,  a  Pressing  Club  director 
and  employed  on  the  Assas- 
sinated Press,  was  left  a  fine 
legacy  by  the  death  of  a  dis- 
tant relative  (in  the  Balkans, 
probably).  The  legacy  con- 
sisted of  more  than  600  Untied 
Cigar  Stores  coupons.  For  600 
coupons  a  dress  shield  (pair  of 
'em)  or  a  ostrich  plume  mav  be 
had. 


NOTABL   ANNIVERSARY 

Eugene  Skinkel  celebrated  his 
36th  wedding  anniversary  May 
10.  during  which  time  he  has 
never  applied  for  divorce. 


We  saw  Walt  Washburne 
mowing  his  lawn  tie  last  week 
while  his  pilot  fish,  Stan  Mitch, 
was  raking  in  something  or 
other. 


JIPTOWN   OPRY   HOUSE 
NOTES 

The  Employes  of  the  Xut  Fac- 
tory at  Jeptown  have  Organized 
a  Dramatic  Society  and  are 
Busily  Engaged  in  Rehearsing 
a  Bran  Xew  Tradegy  by  Rubi- 
dubdub  Jones,  called  "A  Deuce 
of  a  Time  in  a  Dark  Basement." 

It  is  a  Historical  or  hysterical 
Drayma  Based  upon  the  Dis- 
covery of  Seven  Kings  in  a 
Pack  of  Cards  Owned  by  Duke 
Benzimmer  while  with  his  Pack 
of  Hounds  Hunting  Deuces 
Wild  in  the  Royl  Preserves. 
Now,  7  Kings  in  a  Pack  was 
Against  the  Law  of  the  King- 
dom so  the  Plot  Thickens  so 
Thick  that  the  Audience  can't 
see  Straight  and  they  Called 
for  the  Author,  a  Poor  Inno- 
cent Foreign  Peasant.  So  he 
Comes  Before  the  Curtain  to 
Make  a  Speech.  But  it  is  a 
Put  Up  Job,  for  the  Audience 
has  Appointed  a  Committee 
with  a  Strong  Rope,  and  they 
take  the  Poor  Unsuspecting 
Author  out  in  the  Public  Square 
and  Hang  Him.  They  say  it 
will  be  the  Cutest  Play  ever 
Pulled    Off  in   Jiptown. 


WANTED  — THE     P  .\  R  T  Y     THAT 
fell     in     our     cistern     to     return     and 
George    Kavanagh,    12345 


Vii 


FOUND— A  MEDIUM  SIZED,  MID- 
dle  aged  English  bulldog.  Anyone 
can  have  him  who  will  pay  for  a  new 
seat  in  my  pants.  No  questions  asked 
or  answered.  Bill  McShultz,  up  over 
the   Mastodon   Poolroom. 


THE  ELITE  PHOTOGRAPH  AND 
Shooting  Gallery.  Squint  eyed  babies 
and  old  maids  a  specialty.  We  take 
out  the  wrinkles  and  other  blemishes. 
We  touch  and  retouch.  Bring  in  your 
dead  relatives  for  enlargement.  Five 
shots  for  a  dime.  Clay  pigeon  shoots 
every  Friday. 

FOR     SALE  —  EIGHT-ROOM     MOD- 
ern  house  by  gentleman  leaving  town 
with   two   porches,   southern   exposure. 

NOTICE— THE  MISGUIDED  PER- 
son  that  jipped  my  umbrella  had  better 
bring  it  back,  as  he  is  known  to  the 
gentleman  from  whom  I  borrowed  it 
last  -August.  Mr.  Daughernauts,  Box 
77,   Wrinkle  office. 


WHAT     BOB     ROHDE    HAS 
LOST 

They  are  calling  Bob  H. 
Rohde,  star  reporter  on  the 
Tribune,  "Skinny"  now  just  be- 
cause he  has  lost  three  or  four 
pounds  of  weight  recently.  This 
is  entirely  uncalled  for  when  one 
stops  to  consider  that  the  six 
feet  or  so  of  Bob  still  weighs  in 
at  about  200  lbs.,  troy. 


Place  Your 

Large 

Printing 

Orders 


Oni  of  Ibc  lari 


In  the  Hands  of  a  Large,  Absolutely  Reliable  Printing  House 

Send   Your  Small  Orders  As    Well 


Our  Specialties: 

1     CATALOGUES 


labor- 


2  BOOKLETS 

3  HOUSE  ORGANS 

4  TRADE  PAPERS 

5  MAGAZINES 

6  The  larger  orders  of 
Folders  and  Circulars 

Also  Printing  requiring  the    OuTbiJsii 


-     fl  Theeducat.oi 
ilar  direction  on  ih 
callj-.  male,  ihe  > 
ill    oprr^tioK    div     il}id     iiiafit     th, 
.ililv   -.r,,rk    kamiled    bv    davliglil   viiir. 
.nation  a  excellent.     When  you  put  an  order  (, 


jipment  enables  us  to  make 
>mpt  delivery  on  our  special- 
nployees  c  sncenlrated  in  one 
LSS  of  printing  is  which  we 
ikilllul.    q  Our  planl 


.eU 


material  and  workman.  ,,. 
ship  as  the  above,  such  as  |  la 
Proceedings, Directories. Bis-    fr. 


QUICK  DEIIVERY— LOW  PRICIS— HONEST  PPINTINC 
has  been  buill  uo  by  satisfied  customeis.  by  re- 
pot some  reason,  ppnting  orders,  especially  ihe 
the  large  cities  and  slates 


..„ ^^lo  Texas    Letuski.... 

torles,  Books   and   the   like,  i  to  be  in  the  market  for  a  catalogue 
Our    Complet*.     Servir,.     all     '^^  ®'  'l^c  right  time  we  will  draw 


'  part   of    which    is    at 
your  command,  embraces: 
Copy  Wrlllng— lUuitratlng— 
i — Electrotyplng- 


usual  facilities,    fl  You  owe  it  to  yourself  i 
your  firm  to  find  out  what  we  can  do  for  you. 

Write  Its  about  your  priuting  and  your 
printing  troubles.      A^k  it ^  for  quotations. 

Polk  b  La  Salle  Sis. 


TELEPHONE 


MAIN  OFFICE 
3400  So.  Racine  Ave. 


Wright  &  Company 

Premium  Harrisburg  Coal 

Also  Pocahontas 

YARDS 
35th  and  Morgan  Streets — C.  J.  Rv. 

1441  Fleetwood  Street— C.  &  N.  W.  Ry. 
1467  State  Street — Shipping  Office 

16th  Street  and  Michigan  Central  Rv. 

520  X.  Water  Street,  C.  &  N.  VV.  Ry. 


Class  and  Fraternity  Pins  and  Rings  Phone  Randolph  4149 

Commencement  Announcements 

Stationery 

SPIES  BROS. 

MANUFACTURING 
JEWELERS 

Dealers  in  Diamonds  and  Makers  of  Mountings 

STATIONERS 

27  E.  Monroe  Street,  at  Wabash  Avenue 
CHICAGO 


Enjoy  this  7  Day  Cruise  ^^O 
Over  2,000  miles  on  Four  Great  ^t^^ 

Lakes,  meals  and  berth  included,   i^h^^^hbh 

Through  Lakes  Michigan,  Huron,  St.  Clair  and  Erie  via  Charlevoix,  Harbor  Springs,  and  historic  Mackinac  Island,  vicwirg  both  ways 
by  dayUght  the  beauthul  scenery  of  the  Detroit  River  and  St.  Clair  Fla's,  "the  Venice  of  America,"  stopping  at  all  points  of  interest. 
Twelve  hours'  stop  at  Buffalo  allr)\vs  plenty  of  lime  lo  see  Niagara  Falls. 

Beginning  July  1st.  leaves  Chicago  every  Thursday  at  11  A.  M.     Just  a  week's  trip,  but  passengers  are  permitted  free  stop-overs  at 
all  points  of  call  for  a  week  or  longer.     To  aeeommodate  passengers,  automobiles  carried  at  special  rates. 

The  Magnificent  3,000  ton  Steel       Chicago  to  Buffalo 
S.  S.  "MINNESOTA"  (Niagara  Fails)  &  Return 


f  tur    line    of    steamers    oners 
shorter  trips,  equally  enjoyable  i 


S.  S.  "MANITOU" 

3     SAILINGS     EACH    WEEK 
I^ir-st    Trii>     Ji^me?     S2^ 

For  Charlevoix,    Harbor  Springs, 
Petoskey  and  Mackinac  Island 


you    the    greatest    possible    opportunity    for    real    rest    and    genuine    pli 
rhile  they  last,  which  you  can  take  if  you  feel  that  you  have  time  only  for 


S.  S.  "ILLINOIS" 

4    SAILINGS    EACH  WEEK 
Ef*eoti-s.-t?     Jtaine      S!5 

For     Ludington,     Hamlin    Lake, 
Manistee,   Onekama  &  Frankfort. 


'MISSOURI"  $ 


to    Kagawong,    Ont.,    (Georgian    Bay) 
=   and     Return  — 


5  Day  Cruise,  u 


■Weeliljk'  to  JVortlTiem  JMiotxigtiri  r*oii>.t!S 

Fur  illustrated  folder  booli  nf  r.il.j  tours  ,ind  full  information  regarding  Northern  Michigan  resorts,  address 

J.  C.  CONLEY,  General  Passenger  Agent 

Ollice  and  Docks,  North  End  Rush  Street  Bridge,  CHICAGO,  Phones  Rand.  60;  Auto.  489-302 

City  Ticket  Office,   138  S.Clark  St.    Phones  Randolph  60.     Automatic  489-318 


WLCllu 


CHICAGO.S 
BRIGHTEST 


SPOT 


C        JOAN   SAWYER      \f  THE  SENSATION  OF  FILMLANO 

A  ORCHESTRAIR FRESH  AIR 

I    HAROLD  MATGRAFF'"£°y;iT\gSr'::S  E  MOVIFS 

ly    sso.oo      MISS  iniN  5«iin(B       I     sso.oo    IP    11K\J   T  KLlU 

Pri: 

O  I" 


5000 
Free 
Seats 
5000 


In  Our  SI  00,000  Parisian  Garden 

FEATURE  FILMS  ONLY 


Prof.  Armand's  $10,000  War  Spectacle 


Repro- 
ductlor 
of  Itie 


THEFALLj  '^ 

OF  I   mm\ i^^a^a^.^.  — ^» 

ANTWERP  ODDITIES 


SHEP'S  WORLD'S  GREATEST  HUMAN 

CONGRESS  OF 


NOTHING 
LIKE  IT  IN 
THE  WORLD 


LADIES  ANO  CHILDREN  FREE  I™.L*Th'S1T. 


The  Wonder  of  the  Age 

Mechanical 
Base  Ball 

iVPifr>    lOOl    OTMKIi    N^KW    Ii*E>A.TUB2KS 


A  NEW  Parisian  Novelty    The  Speed  King  Ride  oi  America 

^mippNc"  The  RACING  Coaster 

""ttriO        1  A  MILE  AND  A  HALF  of   EXHILARATION 


NOW 


RIVERVIEW 


OPEN 


IIIWESTERN.  BELMONT,  CLYBOURN  AVES.  and  ROSCOE  BOULEVARDIIIIililllllllllllllllllllllllillllllllllllllllllllllinillllllilllillll 


1001   n 


ADMISSION,  TEN  CENTS 

SENSATIONAL    SURPRISES 


m    1001 


.1  N  C  L  U  D  1  N  G_ 


NAUTICAL  CIRCUS  CARNIVAL  XV™ '^'^  ^^™^  ^^■"^" ''^^""- 


ALL  HEADLINE  ACTS- 
LARGEST  WATER  STAGE  IN  WORLD 


Death-Defying  Conflict  in  .?0-foot  Bowl 


THE  "BIG"  LITTLE  SHOW 


Score    of   Fair   Sex    Comedians  and  Musicians 

MOUSED  of  aneOXJJBXvE^S 

A  Million  Thrills— A  Million  Laughs 


STILL  HEADING    i— i      T  A  /^IZ      O   A  UDTT'       giant  racing      i— i 
THE  LIST  I— '     JxA.\^JV     J\.r\.r)Dl  1 coaster  LJ 


A  DEMON  FOR 
SPEED 


jscoieK^  ivxoieK^  SHOvv^s    scoi^K;  AxoieE^  leii^ES 


WE  OPEN 
MAY  12 


COME  TO  RIVERVIEW 


WE  OPEN 
MAY  12 


Every  Wednesday, 

Saturday  and 
Sunday.       8  P.  M. 


BIKE  RACES  2 


WORLD'S 
FASTEST 
RIDERS 


SULZBERGER'S 

GOOD  THINGS  TO  EAT 

MAJESTIC 

HAMS  AND  BACON 

"Deliciously  Different" 

Every  piece  is  carefully  selected,  carefully  cured  and  thor- 
oughly smoked — just  enough  fat  with  the  lean  to  make  them 
unusually  palatable. 

PRIDE 

PRESERVES -JAMS  AND  JELLIES 

Better  than  home  made  and  more  economical 

Ask  your  dealer  today  for  Sulzberger's  Majestic  Hams 
and    Bacon    and    Pride   Preserves,    Jams   and    Jellies. 

SULZBERGER  CS,  SONS  COMPANY 

U.  S.  A. 


Your  Guarantee— The   House 
Back  of  the  Salesman 

The  service  you  get  from  your  engraver  is  determined  by  two 

factors : 

The  Salesman. 

The  House. 

Granted  the  faclHties  to  produce  an  A-1  product — the  prob- 
lem becomes  entirely  a  consideration  of  service. 

A  Barnes-Crosby  Salesman  comes  to  your  office  prepared  to 
give  your  work  constant,  consistent  and  intelligent  attention. 
You  are  sure  of  his  loyalty  to  your  interests  and  his  experi- 
enced advice  when  you  need  it. 

Better  than  that,  you  can  depend  upon  the  reliability  and  the 
resourcefulness  of  the  only  national  organization  which  de- 
votes its  sole  attention  to  the  production  of  advertising  pictures 
and  printing  plates. 

Isn't  this  prospect  of  guaranteed  satisfaction  worth  the  effort 
of  a  telephone  call? 

Day  and  Night  Service 


Barnes-Crosby  Company 


ARTISTS  ENGRAVERS 

CATALOG  and  COLOR  PLATE  MAKERS 
CHICAGO  ST.  LOUIS 

BRANCH  OFFICES    AND  ART  DEPARTMENTS 
Toledo  Cincinnati  Detr 

Indianapolis        Moline        Kansas  City 


Glacier 
National  Park! 

Season  June  15  to  October  1 

Throughout  its  1915  Season  this  tremendous  mountainland,  high  up  in  the  splendid  Montana  Rockies,  may 

be  enjoyed  as  never  before. 

A  new  mammoth  mountain  liotel.  the  "Many-Glacier,"  has  been  erected  on  Lake  McDermott,  in  the  Park's  heart — one  of 

America's  most  notable  tourist  hotels.     The  gateway  hotel,  the  "Glacier  Park" — at  the  Great  Northern's  trackside — and 

nine  enlarged  chalet  groups  complete  a  chain  ofhostelries  thoroughly  delightful. 

Many  new  tours— by  auto-stage  and  launch  deep  in  among  the  mountains,  a-saddle  or  a-foot  over  wonder  trails  onto  the  Continental  Divide— of 

durations  from  one  to  thirty  days— have  been  arranged. 

California's  Expositions  via  Glacier  Park! 

By  through  overland  trains,  from  Chicago.  St.  Paul,  jVIinneapolis,  Kansas  City,  via  Glacier  Park,  Spokane,  Cascade  Mountains,  Seattle,  Tacoma, 
Portland— en  route  a  tour  of  Glacier  National  Park— aboard  new  steamships  Great  Northern  and  Northern  Pacific  a  voyage  down  the  Pacific, 
Portland  via  Astoria  to  San  Francisco— travel  this  "Great  Northern  way"  going  to,  or  returning  from  the  Expositions. 


Send  for  Free  Glacier  Park  literature— "Hotels  and  Tours,"  ' 
tions  Folder.     Clip  the  coupon  and  mail. 

H.  A.  NOBLE,  Ge 


Aeroplane  Map  Folder"  and  "Walking  Tours  Book'""— and  Ex|i 


l&s 


Asl^  for 

and 

insist  upon 

Horlick' 

The  Original 

MALTED 


MILK 

lillliiiiliinliiiiiiiiiliiiiiJiiiiiliilllllllillUllllllillllllUllilllllllllll 

at  all  fountains 


n  n 


TAKE  A 

PACKAGE  HOME 

WITH  YOU 


D    D 


A  nutritious  lunch,  quickly 
prepared  by  the  addition  of 
water   only. 

It's  great  before  responding 
to  a  "rush"  assignment. 


Established  1875 
E.  J.  LEHMAN 


ri(i':i'\'\rR 


State,  Adams  and 
Dearborn  Streets 


Phone 
Private  Exchange  3 


We  Are  Not  Satis- 
fied Until  You  Are 


The  most  dependable  merchandise 

at  the  lowest  prices  is  the  basis 

of  our  success 


Babcock,  Rushton 
&  Co. 

Stocks,  Bonds,   Grain 

Provisions 
Investment    Securities 

MEMBERS 

New  York  Stock  Exchange 

Chicago  Stock  Exchange — Chicago  Board  of  Trade 


The  Rookery 
Chicago 


7  Wall  Street 
New  York 


Established     i  S  8  4 

Fred  Klein  Co. 

626-636  South  Clark  Street 

lllllllllllll!lllllll!llllllllllllllllillllI{!!!n!l!HIIII!l!ll!lll!illlllll!lllllllllllllllllllll!!tllllllllllllllllllllllllllW 

Good  Printers 

l!lllliilll!!'[llIII[::ll|illlllliN[l!lil!l!i:illll!;i|i|llilllili|i!l!i"!!|lt|iiHIBIl'illl;i:illB!li;!l!lSiil!;iin 

for  thirty  years 


<ililllilllllilillllillliillWIIIIIIIIIUilllllllllUiW 

W  c     Specialize     in 

FOREIGN  LANGUAGES 


BARTLETT  FRAZIER 

COMPANY 

Receivers,  Shippers  and  Exporters 
of 


GRAIN 


Orders   Executed  for   Cash  or 
Future  Delivery  in  A II  Markets 

Consignments  Solicited 

Western  Union  Building 

Chicago         -  -         Illinois 


^^*-'*- 


^  Life's  Garden 


(arriejacobs-joivd 

(Aitiu£J«:&s;D«'Di;5w 


Ciarrie  Jacoi>s — lionVi  and  Ootl 
7Q.(>     SO.  MICHIGAN  AVE. 


Phone  Canal  9 

''The  Edelweiss  Line" 
for 


A  Case  of  Good  Judgment 


Copyrighted  IQII  P.  S.  B.  Co. 


mmri 


Haoer. 


MiSitkfaaer 


mmri 


Has  all  the  goodness  of 

other  beers  and  then  some 

If  in  doubt— Try  it  out. 


Pliones  Canal  30 1 7  or  1 487 


©IftStrkfao 


Drink 


PALE 

In  Brown  Bottles 


The  Beer  That  Made 
Milwaukee   Famous 


Phone  Monroe  6200 


" — just  going  to  press'* 

A  prominent  advertiser,  recently  after  looking  us  over,  said: 
"Your  office  reminds  me  of  a  Big-City  Daily  just  going  to  press." 

That  pleased  us  immenseh'.  We  are  a' ways  "just  going  to  press" — always  in 
the  thick  of  the  big  Advertising  and  Merchandising  things  that  are  making  current  business 
history.  We  are  always  in  the  heart  of  new  Campaigns  —  analyzing  propositions,  investi- 
gating conditions,  building  forthcoming  Plans  and  Copy  to  meet  the  changing  conditions 
of  the  market. 

It  requires  an  unusual  organization  to  handle  the  quality  and  quantity  of  fast-moving  business  that  goes  out  of 
our  office  every  day — to  insure  maximum  results  from  every  advertising  dollar  spent. 

For  while  speed  is  maintained,  it  must  be  safe  speed.  Our  methods  are  decisive  but  sure — swift  but  unhurried. 
Judgment  is  on  the  job. 

We  have  planned  and  arc  manned  for  results. 

We  will  be  glad  to  send  a  member  of  our  organization  to  consult  with  you  without  obligation. 

Nichols  -  Finn  Advertising   Company 

Consumers    Building 
222  S.  State  St.,  Chicago 

"Intelligent,  Sustained  Effort  Insures  Success" 


Founded  iS68 

National  Life  Insurance  Company 
of  the  United  States  of  America 

ALBERT  M.  JOHNSON,  President 
HOME  OFFICE:  National  Life  Building,  29  S.  La  Salle  Street,  CHICAGO 

Life  and  Accident  Policies 

Protected  by 

The  State  of  Illinois  and  Thirty  Sister  States 

Backed  with 

More  Than    $12,700,000.00  of  Clean   Assets 
CHICAGO'S  OLDEST  AND  STRONGEST  COMPANY 


Try  a 

SUPREME  Breakfa^ 

To-morroAv! 

What  could  be  finer  for  to-morrow's  breakfast  than  rich,  crisp 
Supreme  bacon  served  with  fresh  guaranteed  Supreme  eggs? 

Seri'e  these  foods  to-morrow,  and  see  how  really  delicious  a  breakfast  can  be. 

There  is  a  Supreme  dealer  near  you  who  sells 

SUPREME 

Food  Produdls 


HAM  BACON 

POULTRY 


EGGS  BUTTER 

LARD 


ITS    ALWAYS   SAFE    TO   SAY    SUPREME" 


Morris  &  Company 


U.  S.  A. 


A.  G.  SPALDING  &  BROS. 

Manufacturers  of  High  Grade  Athletic  Equipment 

for  all  sports  and  pastimes:  Base  Ball,  Lawn  Tennis, 
Golf,  Track,  and  Field  Sports. 

You  don't  "pay  for  the  name"  when  vou  buv  some- 
thmg  "SPALDING." 

You  pay  for  —  and  get  —  satisfaction. 

The  name,  as  evidenced  in  the  Spalding  Trade  Mark, 
is  put  on  as  a  guarantee  of  what  you  pay  for. 

IF  YOU  are  interested  in  Athletic  Sports,  you  should 
have  a  copy  of  the  1915  Spalding  Catalogue.  It's  a 
complete  encyclopedia  of  what's  new  in  sport  and  is 
sent  free  on  request. 

A.  G.  Spalding  &  Bros. 

28  South  Wabash  Avenue  CHICAGO,   ILLINOIS 


This 

"Trade -Mark" 

denotes 


QUALITY! 


Insist  on  it!    "I  D     1'         ' 

It  is  YOUR    Insurance  r  olicy 


Years  of 
Experi- 
ence 
have 
taught 
us  the 
Profes- 
sion's 
Needs! 


combination  "Club  Style"  Bag    No.  A416.  Price  $7.50 


Western     Leather     Mfg.    Company 

184  W.  Lake  St.,  3rd  floor  CHICAGO,  ILL. 


Wool  Soap 

as  you  know,  is  unequaled  for  washing 
woolens  and  fine  fabrics. 

But  did  it  ever  occur  to  you  that  the 
same  qualities  which  make  it  excellent 
for  this  purpose  also  recommend 

Wool  Soap 

for 

Toilet  and  Bath 

The  rare  purity  of  this  product 
combined  with  its  mildness  and 
rich,  creamy  lather  make  it  a 
toilet  article  giving  keen  pleasure 
to  all  who  use  it. 

Try  Wool  Soap  for 
Toilet  and  Bath 

Swift  &  Company,  u.  S.  A. 


"Mr  Muoroi  lUM       "I  wuk  t 


.  Y,.^ 


